A neverending tunnel

[hit_girl_mindy]

WHO| Mindy, open
WHAT| Total brooding and evaluation of life choices here.
WHEN| Week 5
WHERE| Training room and the tower
WARNINGS/NOTES Mindy, so good amount of swearing, thoughts/talk of deaths



The riot should have been the easiest thing. What did Mindy want more than burning, breaking, smashing and shooting any living thing she could spy with her eyes? It should have been like putting on a second skin, and really, it would have been, had she stayed in the Capitol. She'd have finally had her chance to show the Capitol what she really thought of them and all the shit they'd put her through all this time.

Then, of course, they tortured her and right after that, threw her into the Arena. After a temporary good time with some friends, she watched each of them die, even the ones she'd sworn to protect, right down to Ellie, her bestie, and getting killed herself by some murdering cyclops bitch.

And then, back here, where Eva fucking pulls a black out on the Capitol, something Mindy could not stop but admire. The sheer bitchitude she showed, her treachery for the Capitol, only to fuck them balls deep in the ass for three hours.

But that, obviously, spelled Eva's end, and knowing Eva, she wouldn't go for some spectacle execution where they disemboweled her or gunned her down after torture. No, she'd die alone, private, and that was that.

And here she was, three hours of madness in her hands, and she....fumbled. Those memories, that self hatred dragged on her, pushed her down and she doubted herself and everything around her. She wanted to burn things and cause mayhem but for the first time in her life, she feared the pain.

Well, not entirely accurate. She didn't want anymore, not right away for fucks sake. She was still having nightmares of her torture, only now she had to deal with dead Hotaru and Chibi Usa floating around in her dream, along with Ellie falling through ice. It was only the Arena, she knew that, but that didn't stop her smothered yelling, her body taut as the pain came again, swallowing screams and breaking into closed mouth sobs she suppressed. She began to lock her room and not sleep (again). She was in her room, and honestly?

She could use the company.

_

Now numbness was replaced with anger. Chibi Usa was gone, which made her angry, but was doable. She didn't want a girl that young watching people scream and die. But Riley. She was in her district. She was a friend. She was ELLIE'S...something (girlfrined? Friend with benefits? Main girl?), and now she was dead. Again.

Shittiness. At least Ellie had closure, even if it was in the most fucked up way possible.

So Mindy's frustrations went into her obstacle course, jumping through rings, punching bags, seeing how much further she could jump. Her body was tight, screaming at her, and this, after all this time, was comforting now. She was sweaty, bruised, but all by her own hands.

She felt, at least, like herself again, concentrating on how pissed she was.

Comments

[ka_sera_sera]

Roland doesn't train for the Capitolites, to give them a better show, although that's become something that in the back of his mind he's begun to think about. He trains for himself and, now, for Susannah. He hadn't killed a single tribute before he'd died and so she's no closer to being able to buy herself new legs. Little as he likes pitting himself against people who aren't truly his enemies, he intends to do 'better' next time.

Only one other tribute there and he knows he can't match the ferocity that seems to carry her through her course, but he sets himself up next to her anyway. No anger here, no ferocity, but he nearly makes up for it in grim determination, fueled a little by the lingering pain of the brand on his cheek. Not long into it he throws a pole from one of the obstacles into a trap ahead and the pole snaps, which was expected. The two large, broken pieces of it fly directly into the other tribute's path, which wasn't.

Oops.

[hit_girl_mindy]

Mindy was at it by herself save for one other tribute, but right at the moment she may as well have had blinders on, carrying on with her own obstacle running. She was even managing a decent pole vault when she spotted, out of the corner of her eye, two pieces of wood coming at her. She didn't hesitate: she kicked one out of her way and caught the other piece in her hand, the point piece aimed at whoever had thrown the offending tribute.

"This yours?"

[ka_sera_sera]

"Mhm." He makes his way forward, walking around his course instead of through it to hold his hand out for the piece she's holding. Let's pretend we haven't noticed the implied threat there, hmm? "Cry your pardon, sai. I meant no harm by it."

[hit_girl_mindy]

It had been an instant reaction, of course. Mindy didn't know what intentions were being had by whoever had thrown the offending item, but now, seeing it was a misunderstanding, she relaxed, shaking her head.

"Fuck. For a second there I thought I was getting a flying shiv. Glad I was wrong for once."

She offered him a shrug. "No harm done. It happens."

Then she noticed the brand.

"Jeez. You too, huh?"

[ka_sera_sera]

He raises his eyebrows at the 'flying shiv' comment, curious, but her meaning's clear enough that he doesn't need to ask.

May need to ask a second later, though. "Me-?" His hand rises a little as he follows her gaze, her meaning there becoming clear, too. He controls that ever-present urge to poke at the pain on his face, and his hand drops. "Ah. Silly of me to think they'd let it stay off after the arena. Suppose Susannah'll get hers once she gets back, too."

[hit_girl_mindy]

"I think they want us to stew, actually," Mindy said, shrugging. "We can't learn our lesson if they go and take the mark away so quickly, right? It's kinda laughable, in a way. You'd think the fucking torture would be more than enough to make the message stick."

Then again, in her case, they knew her all too well.

"Susannah. Hey, wait, you're Roland, aren't you?"

[ka_sera_sera]

He nods at the question, but decides to answer the rest first. "I think we all knew our lesson well even before. This-" and here he does give in to the urge to touch at the brand, just a little, "-serves even better as a marker to all the others. Lets them all know we can't be trusted. Do you know Susannah very well, then?"

[hit_girl_mindy]

"Oh, I don't think it was just about that. Probably needed to make sure that it was embedded in us, so to speak. Now we serve as a reminder. But yeah, now we definitely can't be trusted, and let me tell you, that's a weight off my shoulders. Last thing I want is for these people to think I'm being complicit."

Never mind it was what she'd been trying to do for months. Never mind that they still had her dad and she had to play nice, even a little, because all of this was important in living SOME kind of life here.

"I know her a little. We had a friend in mind, and we've hung out a few times. She thinks pretty highly of you. My mentor mate Harley, not so much."

[ka_sera_sera]

He smiles at that, though the smile might look like he's chiding her as much as he is agreeing - as it happens, he still wants them to think he's submissive and agreeable to the Capitol's whims, and wants to be able to insist at least semi-plausibly that it is so, if he ever needs to.

Then she mentions Harley and Roland eyes her, smile still faint on his face. "She has her reasons. Might I know your name, since you know mine? Susannah may have mentioned you." And if she has, maybe Roland will know more about her than that she'd the type of person who'd make friends with Harley Quinn.

[hit_girl_mindy]

With as many times that Mindy talked to Susannah, she had the feeling that Roland was from loving the way the Capitol lorded all over them. But for now, she was playing her part too: the impulsive, brash young kid. A mentor that was too wild to be allowed.

It would take time to build a new reputation.

"So I heard. Mindy, actually. Mindy Macready. Heard a bit about you too."

She looked over the obstacle course, then down at her wrist. "Good. Got through that faster."

[ka_sera_sera]

"Mindy. She has mentioned you. Speaks pretty highly of you, in fact. Perhaps we should compare what she's said sometime, when you're not busy training." He waves a hand toward the course she'd been running, then walks over to pick up the stray half of the pole she'd kicked out of the way.

[hit_girl_mindy]

So she mentioned her? Mindy had to admit she felt a little flattered. She knew how highly Susannah thought of Roland, so that actually meant something to her. Still, she this made her all the more curious about him.

"Since we're here," she said, "Susannah mentioned you were a pretty good shot. I was hoping I'd be able to see you in action."

[ka_sera_sera]

He raises his eyebrows, lips spreading into a brief, satisfied smile. "I was thinking of saying the same thing. I favor the gun, but until they stock this place with one of those..."

He walks toward the racks of weapons, tossing the half-pole into the trash as he passes it. "Pick a target," he says, picking up an automatic crossbow and looking it over.

[revvinguptheharley]

"Ooo looks like someone's angry."

The high pitched teasing voice of her fellow mentor rang out through the training room and Harley had arrived. She was in her usual shorts and tank top but a keen eye might notice her hair was shorter then usual and the brand on her cheek was as clear as ever.

She casually picked up a tennis ball looking up at Mind wherever she was on the obstacle course.

[hit_girl_mindy]

"And you went and got a haircut," Mindy said, making a leap at one part of the obstacle course and landing softly on the wobbly plank supporting her weight. Good. She still kept balance well enough and was quick on her feet. That much hadn't changed.

"So how did you ice it in the Arena?"

[revvinguptheharley]

Harley brought a hand up to sweep back her hair gracefully. "It got singed during the riots. All those pretty fires...how could I resist running out there and making smores?" She chuckled.

As for her death "That girl Rose got me but I got away. Susannah gave me the mercy kill because I wasn't having fun anymore." Her hand slid along the table to pick up a club and a ball, throwing the latter and hitting it with the former to send it flying at Mindy.

[hit_girl_mindy]

"I could use a smore right now," Mindy said aloud, right before jumping off the wooden plan and then running and doing a back. Phew. She could still do those no problem. Excellent.

"No kidding, Rose?! Man, I misjudged her then. So it sounds like she was your Azula. A shame she makes it so hard to hate her."

[revvinguptheharley]

"Me too, I went at her swinging but she had these needles...I probably woulda been OK but a lucky gut shot was it. Right through my stomach. Of all the rotten luck." She shrugged.

"No word yet on if they'll throw us back in the next arena for being such wicked awful girls. Without Eva around the Tributes are gonna need us to work three times as hard to overcome how much people hate us."

She sent another ball, then a third flying at Mindy to give her a challenge while they chatted.

[hit_girl_mindy]

Mindy hit the ball back at Harley, grinning in spite of herself. With her here, she actually was feeling a little bit better.

"That sounds like Rose: prepared. You shouldn't have picked a fight with her. She's not a killer but she sure as shit knows how to take care of herself."

She sighed. "Yeah. I mean, she never really popped up that much, but she's the one who's been mentor the longest. But shit. I hope our district isn't getting into shit because of what the three of us have been doing, you know?"

[revvinguptheharley]

"Yeah no kidding. They were really nice to me when we came to visit." Harley sighed and swatted the ball back missing Mindy by a mall. She threw the next two balls knocking them one after the other at Mindy.

"All that responsibilities on our shoulders now. Before we could always count on Eva to toe the party line and keep the hard core Capitolites happy but now all they have is a lunatic and a mini assassin.

[hit_girl_mindy]

"Me too," Mindy said, hitting the balls back at her. "It kinda motivated me to try and win the whole thing.

The prospect of that was pretty terrifying. "Yeah, even though she tended not to hang out with her tribs too much. But hey, a mini assassin and a crazy girl are pretty cool peeps for mentors, don't you think?"

[revvinguptheharley]

"Well of course. Who's cooler then us?" she challenged swatting the balls away. Clearly this was too easy for Mindy so she set to scaling the outside of the obstacle coarse to join her on the wobbly board.

"So the real question is...do we stop screwing around and focus on keeping them safe? Or do we keep earning ourselves these little conversation pieces?" She tapped her scar before bending her knees to shake the board.

[hit_girl_mindy]

This earned a little grin from Mindy. "Yeah. we're apparently too bad ass NOT to go and get tortured by the Capitol. We were all taken there, now that I think about it. Of course, you wound up being taken later, so you're not as cool as me and Eva. Sorry."

She threw the balls again.

"I don't know," she admitted. "To be honest, I'm hoping the fucking dreams stop for a little while. It'd be nice to have a nap where I don't wake up screaming."

[revvinguptheharley]

Harley gracefully twirled slapping the balls back to Mindy with the backs of her hands.

"Have you tried hallucinogens? I know I have really crazy dreams when I take some kinds of cold medicine. Usually they aren't scary just weird. And if I think they're weird that should give you a good idea of how weird they are."

[hit_girl_mindy]

Yup, they were pretty much playing handball. Mindy, though, was actually pretty adept at this, doing it in her spare time.

"Like, drugs? No, didn't occur to me, for obvious reasons. Is it actually supposed to help?"