hit_girl_mindy (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
hit_girl_mindy) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
thecapitol2014-09-24 11:28 pm
hit_girl_mindy) wrote in thecapitol2014-09-24 11:28 pm
Entry tags:
A neverending tunnel
WHO| Mindy, open
WHAT| Total brooding and evaluation of life choices here.
WHEN| Week 5
WHERE| Training room and the tower
WARNINGS/NOTES Mindy, so good amount of swearing, thoughts/talk of deaths
The riot should have been the easiest thing. What did Mindy want more than burning, breaking, smashing and shooting any living thing she could spy with her eyes? It should have been like putting on a second skin, and really, it would have been, had she stayed in the Capitol. She'd have finally had her chance to show the Capitol what she really thought of them and all the shit they'd put her through all this time.
Then, of course, they tortured her and right after that, threw her into the Arena. After a temporary good time with some friends, she watched each of them die, even the ones she'd sworn to protect, right down to Ellie, her bestie, and getting killed herself by some murdering cyclops bitch.
And then, back here, where Eva fucking pulls a black out on the Capitol, something Mindy could not stop but admire. The sheer bitchitude she showed, her treachery for the Capitol, only to fuck them balls deep in the ass for three hours.
But that, obviously, spelled Eva's end, and knowing Eva, she wouldn't go for some spectacle execution where they disemboweled her or gunned her down after torture. No, she'd die alone, private, and that was that.
And here she was, three hours of madness in her hands, and she....fumbled. Those memories, that self hatred dragged on her, pushed her down and she doubted herself and everything around her. She wanted to burn things and cause mayhem but for the first time in her life, she feared the pain.
Well, not entirely accurate. She didn't want anymore, not right away for fucks sake. She was still having nightmares of her torture, only now she had to deal with dead Hotaru and Chibi Usa floating around in her dream, along with Ellie falling through ice. It was only the Arena, she knew that, but that didn't stop her smothered yelling, her body taut as the pain came again, swallowing screams and breaking into closed mouth sobs she suppressed. She began to lock her room and not sleep (again). She was in her room, and honestly?
She could use the company.
_
Now numbness was replaced with anger. Chibi Usa was gone, which made her angry, but was doable. She didn't want a girl that young watching people scream and die. But Riley. She was in her district. She was a friend. She was ELLIE'S...something (girlfrined? Friend with benefits? Main girl?), and now she was dead. Again.
Shittiness. At least Ellie had closure, even if it was in the most fucked up way possible.
So Mindy's frustrations went into her obstacle course, jumping through rings, punching bags, seeing how much further she could jump. Her body was tight, screaming at her, and this, after all this time, was comforting now. She was sweaty, bruised, but all by her own hands.
She felt, at least, like herself again, concentrating on how pissed she was.
WHAT| Total brooding and evaluation of life choices here.
WHEN| Week 5
WHERE| Training room and the tower
WARNINGS/NOTES Mindy, so good amount of swearing, thoughts/talk of deaths
The riot should have been the easiest thing. What did Mindy want more than burning, breaking, smashing and shooting any living thing she could spy with her eyes? It should have been like putting on a second skin, and really, it would have been, had she stayed in the Capitol. She'd have finally had her chance to show the Capitol what she really thought of them and all the shit they'd put her through all this time.
Then, of course, they tortured her and right after that, threw her into the Arena. After a temporary good time with some friends, she watched each of them die, even the ones she'd sworn to protect, right down to Ellie, her bestie, and getting killed herself by some murdering cyclops bitch.
And then, back here, where Eva fucking pulls a black out on the Capitol, something Mindy could not stop but admire. The sheer bitchitude she showed, her treachery for the Capitol, only to fuck them balls deep in the ass for three hours.
But that, obviously, spelled Eva's end, and knowing Eva, she wouldn't go for some spectacle execution where they disemboweled her or gunned her down after torture. No, she'd die alone, private, and that was that.
And here she was, three hours of madness in her hands, and she....fumbled. Those memories, that self hatred dragged on her, pushed her down and she doubted herself and everything around her. She wanted to burn things and cause mayhem but for the first time in her life, she feared the pain.
Well, not entirely accurate. She didn't want anymore, not right away for fucks sake. She was still having nightmares of her torture, only now she had to deal with dead Hotaru and Chibi Usa floating around in her dream, along with Ellie falling through ice. It was only the Arena, she knew that, but that didn't stop her smothered yelling, her body taut as the pain came again, swallowing screams and breaking into closed mouth sobs she suppressed. She began to lock her room and not sleep (again). She was in her room, and honestly?
She could use the company.
_
Now numbness was replaced with anger. Chibi Usa was gone, which made her angry, but was doable. She didn't want a girl that young watching people scream and die. But Riley. She was in her district. She was a friend. She was ELLIE'S...something (girlfrined? Friend with benefits? Main girl?), and now she was dead. Again.
Shittiness. At least Ellie had closure, even if it was in the most fucked up way possible.
So Mindy's frustrations went into her obstacle course, jumping through rings, punching bags, seeing how much further she could jump. Her body was tight, screaming at her, and this, after all this time, was comforting now. She was sweaty, bruised, but all by her own hands.
She felt, at least, like herself again, concentrating on how pissed she was.
Re: Desperate people?
"So you were going out to punish her. Fair enough: its you, and if anyone would know to go after the thing that a person hates the most, you would. I was sure that Eva might have killed you for that, seeing how she went after Felicity, but I guess Eva thought the girl had it coming. Makes me feel stupid that I went out and kicked her ass."
Because no one spits at her, damn it.
"Yeah, at the funeral. Seriously, that bitch had some nerve, trying to keep us out of that."
no subject
The funeral had been appropriately somber, but the kind of thing Eva would hate. All those people focused on her.
no subject
And Mindy would be damned if she wouldn't at least pay respects to Eva: it had taken balls to do what she did that night, wondering if everything she'd done would be forgotten later.
no subject
"Well as much fun as hating on Eponine is look at the time. We're gonna be sleeping till noon at this rate and that's hardly good Mentoring."
Harley normally would sleep in late but in the last couple weeks she'd been waking earlier and trying harder to get her tributes to train with her.
no subject
Mindy laughed at the insinuation that she would actually be sleeping in. "That'd be a nice dream. I'm young Harl, my metabolism is not to be fucked with. Keep in my mind I was making sure people at night didn't fuck around: strict regiment."
Drinking had toyed with that a little, but Mindy had figured out a decent enough schedule around it.
no subject
"Yeah, yeah. I've heard that before. You may have been trained since birth to be some kind of ninja with a sailors mouth and a anti-hero complex. But you're also a teenager. Your insides are in a constant state of flux." She teased rolling to her feet.
"You're welcome to join me or not, but Mama's ready for some mildly disturbing dreams that could either be nightmares or my own madness." She called over her shoulder making her way to bed, hips swaying in an almost unconscious teasing fashion.
no subject
"I guess you have a point, not that I want to acknowledge that. But even though I'm likely to have a bunch of awful dreams that will make me all PTSD when I wake up, I can totally thank you for telling me to go to sleep early."
That was a joke, of course.
"Yeah, maybe I will hit the hay. Might be a good idea."
Why Harley looked like she was walking the catwalk to go the bed was anyone's guess.