thecapitol | bottle your tears

Who| Mariko and everyone out there!
What| Mariko trying to keep herself together.
Where| the ever so popular roof of tribute center
When| right after Cruentus and Penny's post
Warnings/Notes| Mentions of self-starvation but that's about it, for now.

It hadn't taken a long time from her to learn just what was the true nature of the Capitol. She had learned about the avoxes, the chip inside her, the fate of district 3 and the horrifying power that these people had over her and other tributes. She had been watching television at the district 11 suite, when that shocking video had been posted online. After seeing it, Mariko had felt something heavy on her chest suffocating her. She had quickly left the suite to find some place safe, a place where she could breathe again.

So now Mariko stood on the roof top and stared at the view in front of her with a blank expression. Devastated didn't even begin to describe what she was feeling now. The lack of self-determination and control made her feel so frustrated, sad, angry and simply just upset. The food didn't hold much appeal to her anymore, not after what she had witnessed in the last arena, causing her to lose some weight. She missed her parents and her only friend Nanako and her first love Kaoru. All those important people to her who she would never see again. She wouldn't be able to speak Japanese ever again. She would have loved to speak English and French to people here, after all she had put lot of effort to her studies back at home! But now it all seemed pointless.

She looked down at her colorless hands and bit down on her lower lip. She hadn't been able to find nail polish of the right color on her own and it didn't feel right to ask favors from avoxes. Even the beautiful dark red dress she was wearing now didn't feel right-- it wasn't the dress she had chosen for herself but a dress that someone else had wanted her to wear.

Mariko felt like she was never going to feel happy again. It was like this world had robbed it away from her along with the other things. She wanted to cry so badly, but didn't want to give anyone who might be watching her that satisfaction (she had cried enough while being out in the arena).

Just when she felt like she would explode from all these feelings storming inside her, she closed her eyes, clenched her fists and began to scream.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" She screamed as loud as she could, only stopping for a brief moment to catch air before starting again.

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"That--!" She paused and took a deep breath. Just how self-centered and rude he could be?! This man certainly annoyed Mariko more than intimidated.

"That had nothing to do with you! I never approached you! What are you even doing here? Watching young girls from the shadows! It gives me creeps!"

He looks around him for a moment and then raises the glass at her.

"Looks like I haven't approached you either, Kiddo." He drinks. "It's a free roof. Well as free as this place gets, I was just up here for a scream free few hours. And then you came up here and decided I was creepy."

He gives her something of a bland look, though to himself he finds her over reaction to him kind of funny.

Mariko did not find anything funny or relatively amusing in this situation. In fact she felt rather offended by Tony's attitude and the fact that he had managed to surprise her on such private moment.

"Oh! But you were the one who talked first! You were the one who watched me secretly!" Her voice was getting hoarse and breathing heavy after all the shouting. "You-- if you had any tact you would have left me alone!"

"You made the first sound." Tony counters her easily. "And I wasn't watching you, I didn't even know who came up until you went Home Alone there."

He puts his glass down, then rolls his shoulders.

"Well I've never really been known for tact. They didn't even bother to put that in my files, it's public knowlege really. At home at least, and to anyone who's met me here. Which is a slowly growing nnumber. The term 'mouthy ass' comes up a lot when talking about me."

"But not to you!" She cried out loud again, sounding almost hysterical this time.

This argument was going nowhere and surely the other man knew it, too. So why did he insist on keeping it up? Did he really enjoy tormenting her that much? The frustration and anger, mixed with a fear made Mariko to began lose control over herself.

"It had nothing to do with you! I didn't even know you were there! You should have stayed quiet and left! But you stayed and watched me and now you are being rude and acting like it's a good thing! No no no! Why are you still here and making fun out of me?! This is why you men are so disgusting! You don't care about anyone else but yourself!"

Edited 2014-07-12 12:38 (UTC)

"Funny thing about public areas. You scream in them, people are going to talk to you, and there's a 48/52 chance they could be a guy."

He just sits there and lets her run out of steam at her shouting at him.

"Actually, my not caring about anyone but myself really has nothing to do with gender, and more to do with how I was raised. I would still be this selfish and as antagonistic if I was a woman, probably more so really. What with everything I would have had to go through being a woman in such a male dominated area which business and inventing is. But still, I'm feeling a bit projected onto here, and that's the real point I'm getting to."

He pauses for a second.

"Probably getting at."

Mariko panted heavily, trying to catch her breath and recover from that sudden outburst of hers. Getting worked up so quickly was more taxing that she had though and Mariko began to feel rather weak and light headed.

"No," she tried to yell back but her voice didn't come out nearly as strong as she had intended. "No no no! Don't you dare to talk about women that way! Do you really think I don't know how you men are?! You all are lying, selfish and cruel!" She cried out loud, feeling the tears threatening to gather to corners of her eyes.

Edited 2014-07-18 01:08 (UTC)

His face starts to look unimpressed.

"I own a fortune 500 company, you don't have to tell me that men are selfish cruel liars. And I can easily say everyone who's tried to kill me is a man. But woman do all those things too. It's part of being human, kid."

"Don't call me that. It's rude." Never mind that she hadn't told him her name yet, but still she couldn't help but feel like she was being looked down when addressed like that.

"Oh! Should I be impressed by that achievement? Do you believe that flaunting with your money will make me think more highly of you?" She scoffed. "And whose fault do you think that is? Women wouldn't have to be like that if it weren't for men."

"Well, you're acting like one, and without your name. Kid is what you're going by."

He rubs his forehead, getting frustrated with her over-reactions.

"What I'm saying is that in my high profile position I know exactly what 'men' are like. And for the record, it has to do with human nature, not gender. When did you start up with this whole men are evil business?"

"No. You ought to address me either miss or lady. It's only proper!" She straightened her stance and lift her chin up a bit, to look more convincing. Unfortunately for her, the fear still lingered on Mariko's eyes along with her exhaustion making her look just defensive.

"You--!" Her eyes widened at the question. "The nerve you have. That is no one of your business."

"Or, you know I could just call you by your name. I hear that's also a custom in some weird parts of the world." This of course coming from a man who hasn't introduced himself either, though that's mostly because he's never had to introduce himself since he was 5.

"Well you're the one rubbing this 'not my business' in my face. So I kind of can at least ask."

As frustrated as he is at her, he still is showing absolutely no sign of standing up any time soon, however there is a part of him that doesn't want to incase she raises her pitch at him more.

"And why should I tell you my name? There is no reason for me to do that, especially when you've been nothing but rude and awful to me." From a hypocrite to another. Mariko's behavior towards Tony had been nothing but rude so far and it wasn't going to change any timer soon, considering her upset and irritated mood.

"No you can't! It's rude and I don't care about what do you think about yourself! Just as any other man isn't allowed to ask me such private questions. "

Edited 2014-08-02 20:34 (UTC)

"Well, put it this way, I call you girl. Or I call you by your name, it's bothering you more than me. Also, I think there's a two-way street of rude here."

Tony just relaxes into his chair more.

"Well if it's so private, you could always keep this whole male aggression thing to yourself, and I'm not going to ask about what caused it."

He knows saying that will probably set her off again but really, it's the best way to get him to not push the topic.

bottle your tears

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