thecapitol | indisposed in disguise

Entry tags:

indisposed in disguise

Who| Blaine and OPEN
What| Blaine lost three good friends (Diana, Atticus and Lottie), watched his own body rot away, and was killed a little more violently this time around. He's not okay in the head but he'll be damned if he lets you know that. Too bad his mask might be cracking.
Where| Tribute Tower. Three settings; District 2 Suites, Boxing Area in Training Center and Common Mess Hall
When| Final week of the Arena
Warnings/Notes| Blaine's a little broken. I'll add warnings as needed.

[District 2 Suites]

When Blaine woke up he took a shower and paid extra attention to his hair. The movements of the comb as he flattened out his curls was almost therapeutic. Each time he slid it's teeth through the black strands he felt himself getting a little more control. There were dark circles under his eyes, but he knew how to use the products of the Capitol by now and it was surprisingly easy to cover them up.

He had been back in the Capitol long enough now to know that he couldn't find Lottie, Atticus or Diana. He knew sometimes people didn't come back because he had seen posts on the network about it before. He had convinced himself that it wouldn't happen to the people that he knew though. They couldn't be among the unlucky. Diana had been a sure win for Victory. Lottie was popular because she was so flirty and fun. He and Atticus could play up their matching faces for the camera, and hadn't the werewolf and Kurt provided enough heartbreaking entertainment for the way that they stuck together? What did these Capitol people even want if it wasn't a good show?

It hurt to think about that, so instead he focused on his hair. He flattened it until it was stuck to his hair, all hint of curls hidden away. He couldn't look like Atticus right now because that hurt too.

He gathered up work out clothes and folded them carefully into a duffel bag before leaving his room. A cheerful enough expression was plastered onto his face as he walked through the Suite. He planned to get to the Training Center as quickly as possible, but he also did his best to not seem opposed to the idea of stopping and taking to his Suite mates.

[Boxing in Training Center]

He didn't eat breakfast. Instead he went right down to the Training Center. The gel here was even better than the stuff back home as he could work out and sweat without a single curl breaking free. He supposed he ought to be grateful for that, just as much as he should be for finally becoming a star.

He picked out a bag and wrapped his hands in tape before he started to hit it. Each time he let a fist land against the bag he considered all of the things the Capitol would expect him to be grateful about.

Hair gel. Good food. Clothing. His face on TV.

The honor of being killed for their entertainment.

His face was focused entirely on the bag as he pounded away at it, imagining himself with the ability to push each of those things away.

[Common Mess Hall]

After working out, Blaine really needed to eat something. He had been careful to clean himself up and was dressed as impeccably as ever. He sat with his back to the screens, not wanting to watch any more death. It was surprisingly hard, as they seemed to want to display the Games everywhere.

It probably would have been smarter to eat in his room, but he still was holding out the hope that he'd see one of his missing friends.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Sandy actually felt guilty about the look on his face an her cheeks burned.

"Sorry, you had to do something to apologize though right? You didn't just give up?"

Blaine nodded then. "I kept trying but he kept ignoring me," Blaine admitted. "Then he basically told me to stop because he couldn't trust me any more. He had just started to forgive me when I was pulled here."

After a moment, "We don't want the Capitol to know any of this, Sandy." He reached out to put a hand on her arm, to show how serious he was about it. "He doesn't need my betrayal shoved in his face by interviewers and commercials. It's hard enough that we have to play up our feelings for each other to please the audience."

Sandy looked confused, then her face fell and her eyes sharpened, tensing up and casting a quick panicked look at the cuff on her arm.

"Well it's um...well it's probably too late for that." She nodded at her cuff wondering if he even knew what it was.

Blaine frowned a bit and pulled back. "It records?" he asked.

"Probably?" She buried her face in her hands feeling a creeping burning blush of embarrassment "They put these things on all of us who cause trouble to "Keep an eye on us" and "Make sure we don't hurt ourselves". So we figure they probably have all sorts of recording stuff in them." When she pulled her hands down she looked apologetic and nervous.

"I'm really sorry...I didn't mean to..." To what? Make him talk about something he didn't want the Capitol to know? Make him trust her enough to keep a secret when she had no choice in the matter? She didn't know just what but she was sorry about it.

Blaine shrugged. "It's one thing for the higher ups to know," he admitted. "Another for the audience. They might be able to use it against me, but I can still put on a good show."

He touches her arm lightly. "They probably already know about it. They do find ways to exploit all of our mistakes."

"I hate them." Sandy grumbled putting her head in her hands and curling her fingers in her hair, frustrated to the point of almost pulling it.

"I hate them I hate them I hate them. They have all this amazing stuff this technology and food and clothes and this is what they do with it?"

Blaine reached out and rubbed her back a bit. "It's okay," he said, though he knew that it wasn't and wouldn't be until the Games stopped.

She let him keep rubbing her back. It felt a little comforting, but could only do so much.

"I mean my world was crap man! Really dark and depressing. It rained every day, no one could leave. The cops could do whatever they wanted...but here?" She was always going back and forth on which world was worse.

"I wish I could take you to my world. It's so normal and boring. We could all use some boring."

That made her laugh gently.

"Can't...I promised Pruna I'd go back home with her and become a priestess." An evil priestess but she opted not to mention that little detail.

Blaine chuckled a bit. "That sounds a lot better," he admitted. "All I can offer you is high school."

High School. It sounded so positively mundane compared to all of this.

"If I live long enough to see High School, I think I'll skip the prom. I've had enough fancy parties."

"I've had fun at school dances. It might just be that you need a fancy party in a different context." He smiled a bit, remembering some of the good dances he had been to (and forcing away the memories of the bad). "Kurt was voted prom queen, you know. They meant it as a mean joke, but he totally turned it around and made it his own thing. That and he got a nice crown."

Sandy couldn't help but laugh and then try to bite it back, "Really? How'd he do that?" she tried to imagine swaggering up in front of a crowd of people and claiming a crown like the past victors. It made her stomach knot.

"Well, he took the crown and made a joke. Then we danced in front of them, and for a second it was just the two of us. All of those people who thought they'd be able to break the gay kid by calling him a queen got their stupid joke shoved into their faces."

He smiled a bit at the pleasant memory. "It was beautiful. He was beautiful."

Sandy gave a half hearted smile. The memory didn't warm her as much as it did Blaine but she could still find enough humanity in her to to be supportive.

"You really love him." she observed from his features to the tone of his voice.

He nodded at that. "I do," he admitted. "That can be dangerous for both of us, but it's worth it."

Sandy couldn't help but worry. Even though Blaine was older then her he seemed so much delicate. But he had died almost as many times as she had already and was still trying.

"I guess it might be easier for me, Pruna's tougher then me."

"She can be pretty scary too," Blaine pointed out. He meant that in a good way though. She was someone to look out for in the Arena. "That's good for you though. We all could use some scary."

Sandy actually smiled at that.

"Might as well fight fire with fire, or whatever they say." She'd never understood that phrase but fighting scary with more scary actually seemed to make sense.

Blaine nodded a bit. "Usually I'd say that would just burn the forest down, but in this case it really works."

It was sad that they were kids and had to think about it, but Blaine didn't dwell too much on it. It would just add to the dark pit already forming in his stomach. "So how did you come to get feelings for her? Is scary just your thing?" he teased a bit, hoping that she'd know he didn't mean that part seriously.

She felt her cheeks start to burn at the mention of "Feelings" again.

"I just...well we hung out alot. And because I started teaching her about like...you know stuff. Ice cream and TV and elevators and whatever. We became friends. She took care of me in the last arena when a beartrap crushed my leg.

Blaine winced a bit at the mention of the beartrap but found the other stuff too adorable not to focus on that instead. He grinned a bit. "I'm glad that you guys had stuff to bond over. She seems like she comes from a difficult world. I mean, if she's an assassin... That has to be tough for a young girl."

Sandy considered it for a minute.

"Maybe, but if it is she never shows it. She loves her work and is really proud of it. She even tried to teach me some tricks for getting rid of pain." Tricks that she was still practicing at night before bed. She never wanted to know pain like that bear trap ever again. But it was so hard to give up everything she loved to the storm that Pruna had taught her to imagine in her head.

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