thecapitol | (no subject)

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WHO| open
WHAT| Kaidan is back from the dead (again) and a little upset about this whole thing
WHEN| p. much rn.
WHERE| Anywhere, just specify owo

Kaidan's body aches. Two rockslides the original arena, and a falling building this one. It seems that Kaidan's luck is thin when it comes to anything that could possibly ever fall on him. He's freshly awake, only by a bit, and stretching his legs. He doesn't want to stay cooped up, not when he can feel the start of a migraine pushing at his temples, not when it feels just being caged up like an animal.

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"It would be better than it just never having existed." Kaidan says lightly, turning to face her even if she's looking away. "Everything keeps going with or without us. Always has."

She smirks and laughs to herself, though the thoughts in her head are bitter and selfish. At least she knows that, and so she laughs anyway, "Doesn't seem fair, really. Do you know what I think of, every night as I lay in my ridiculous bed? I think about how many people I'm letting down. By just... not being there. Its selfish. To think that just my absence alone has any effect on anything? But I can't shake it."

"Shepard, you have great people behind you. With or without... they'll always follow your lead. Just because you aren't there doesn't mean your influence has ended." Kaidan shifts a bit closer, as if trying to support her whatever way he can. "Instead, think of who you can help here. It's what you do Shepard, and people here need that, one way or another." Kaidan is one of them, but he doesn't say that out loud.

Edited 2012-07-14 06:51 (UTC)

Shepard lets out sigh she didn't quite realize she'd been holding. She appreciates what he's telling her, but believing it is something else entirely. Maybe she's just stubborn that way. But it's hard not to to feel at least the tiniest bit guilty of even considering focusing her energy on this place when she knows what is still out there waiting for her at home. That doesn't mean that she won't. It's just the letting go that she's struggling with. Having Kaidan right next to her helps with that almost as much as it hinders. A constant reminder of home. But also a constant reminder of who she is.

"There is... a lot going on here that we don't know about," is her strange way of saying that she agrees with him. It seems just vague enough for someone to overhear and misinterpret her meaning: that she intends to find out exactly what all 'that' is.

"There is. And I'll stand by your side. I'm not leaving it again." And he won't. He knows exactly where he belongs, and it's here with Shepard. Everything that's out there, waiting for him, on him-- all that can wait. Making a difference where you are is what matters, not wishing you were elsewhere.

She reaches over in that moment and touches his arm; a silent thank you she doesn't think she quite has the words for. Almost doesn't know what to say to that. It's a humbling thing to stand there and realize that she has people in her life like Kaidan. Loyal, good people.

Kaidan gives Shepard a smile, just a small tilt of his lips before nodding once. He understands the gesture, and feels the same way towards her. He looks back out the window after just a second-- still pleased, still contented, and still happy to have Shepard at his side.

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