thecapitol | City never sleeps so I guess I never slept on.

Entry tags:

City never sleeps so I guess I never slept on.

Who| Dave and Feferi, Gary, Clara and Steve.
What| Punchy is "dead", Dave needs to deal with it.
Where| D9, D11
When| Spanning over the week after the Panem Nightly post.
Warnings/Notes| Talkin' about murder.

It's hard to process real death after being surrounded by fake death for so long. It's like switching from lite milk to full cream, because it's doing something to his stomach. But then, processing infers some level of understanding or acceptance. Dave didn't talk to anyone when the cheery presenters woefully announced that his friend was dead. It's not the first time he's disappeared, it's not the first time anyone's disappeared, but it's different this time.

They're just lying. They're probably lying. There's no reason to believe them, but there's no reason not to, either. Punchy is gone, he isn't in his room and he isn't staggering back into the commons no matter how long Dave sits around on the couches and pretends the News got it wrong.

It shouldn't be this hard anymore, but it feels like there's a vice around his chest when he thinks about it. There's sad irony in the fact that the guy reminded him so vividly of his Bro, then they got close, then he died. It's hilarious, really, that all of his foundations are starting to crumble slowly or very rapidly and he doesn't know how to handle it anymore.

Maybe he owes it to Punchy to feel something, or show something, but it's easier to be mindless and numb about all of this. He doesn't drink or party, he just deals with it. He's either sleeping all day or awake all hours and when anyone sees him, he's fronting. Trying too hard to be over it too fast.

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There is nothing interesting about the ceiling, and yet, it's oddly compelling. Dave is staring upward as if it holds all the secrets to the universe. In reality, it's more like a blank, neutral surface to reflect on. Very peaceful, very- Oh god, he didn't hear her come in.

He sits up suddenly, then slumps his shoulders in an effort to regain his casual air. It was not preceded by seconds of turtle like flailing as he struggled to pull himself up, he has no idea why anyone would think that.

"Anyone who wanted that box would have to follow you to the Aquarium every time you try it. So unless you want a herd of well meaning stalkers, you might want to try again, Free Willy." Of course, he has absolutely no idea that she's earnestly trying to break the ice here. There's no ice, he's just cool. Mellow cool. Like moo juice.

"I wouldn't mind having someone to come with me." Feferi invites herself to a seat on the edge of the bed, now that he's sat up and noticed her. Thankfully he isn't as naked as she presumed he would be. "So why don't you tell me what's bothering you. I know something's up."

She just doesn't know what. Was it losing the arena? Losing his powers again? Something else? Feferi can't even begin to guess, but she can be here to listen. He's only her fake boyfriend, but he's still her very real friend.

"Try Karkat. Show him all the crabs." He both does and doesn't understand that she's offering to take him. He doesn't feel particularly receptive to invitations with the funk he's been in, it doesn't help that she's starting to Real Talk him. It isn't her fault, obviously. It's all on him, which makes it more frustrating.

"Not much. The ush. Guess it's all downhill once you hit sixteen." He props his elbows on his knees, leaning his face on his hand lazily. He knows this game gets old fast, but it's hard. Admitting shit. Feelings, etc.

"All I need to do that is a mirror." Mutual Karkat heckling, good. That's a good sign, right? She guesses that if Dave still has it in him to joke around, then there's some hope for picking him up out of this funk. But if he thinks she's going to just back off with that kind of lame excuse, he hasn't been paying much attention at all.

"Now I know it not just that." She shifts closer, within arm's reach, to reach out and fuss with his hair, trying to put some stray strands back in place, as much as he'll let her. "So you can either tell me what's bothering you, or you can let me hassle you for a while longer until you give up and tell me."

Mutual Karkat heckling is wonderfully cathartic, which is why he decided to go ahead with the bingo game despite not being in high spirits. But nothing is enough and nothing makes him forget the fact that Punchy is gone.

His mouth tightens into a deeper frown when she pushes for information, but the annoyance is stupidly dampened when she fusses with his hair. It feels nice, and it would feel nice to open up, but there's something blocking the words from coming. He leans away from the hand, because it's threatening his ability to keep a tight lip on things.

"I dunno. Does it have to be one specific thing? Everything about being here sucks. People die, and you don't know if they'll come back, everyone says they do and then sometimes they don't. The inconsistency is fucking with me, that's all." He gives his shoulders a dramatic shrug. "I don't know what you want me to say. I'm always bothered."

"I dunno he says! That is probably the best joke you have told me so far." Ribbing him is probably not helpful, but Feferi takes that as her cue to kick off her shoes and scoot further onto the bed, so that she can sit right next to him. She rests a comforting hand on his back, rubbing gently, as if that might coax the real issues out of him. "I know it's tough here, but I also know that you usually try a lot harder to pretend it doesn't bother you."

This would be so much better with a proper pile, but she has to make due. Sitting shoulder to shoulder will have to be enough. The more he pushes her though, the more worried it makes her.

"So who didn't come back this time?"

The closer Feferi gets to him, the further he wants to retreat in on himself. None of this feels right, not the coaxing or the hand on his back. He feels frustrated, but he doesn't want to snap at her just because he doesn't know what to do with comfort. He hunches his shoulders as she rubs, opting not to jerk away or swat her.

"Woah, woah. Shooting straight for the crotch there, huh?" He takes the chance to act defensive, escaping from the hand by shifting himself to the side as if so floored by her completely obvious assumption that he needs space. "We are not playing Cluedo, Feferi. We are going to drop it, that's what I want to do." He waves that around like it's some sort of ace card, when he speaks up again his voice is softer. "Let's just go look at fish, alright?"

Dave's reaction catches Feferi off-guard. She's used to that kind of thing from Sollux or Karkat, but from Dave she doesn't know what to make of it. She gapes at him for a second before folding her hands in her lap, and deciding that she suddenly finds the ceiling really interesting.

"You don't really want to do that, do you?" She's not going to stop calling it how she sees it, and in truth, she's just a little bit hurt. Not because he won't talk to her, but that he doesn't just tell her straight. "I think I'm going to go back to my room. When you feel like talking, call me and I will come back up. Or you can come see me."

She's already crawling her way off the other side of the bed before she finishes talking. He's too upset, and when he's upset, she worries, and when she worries, she can't even think about showing him all her favorite aquarium fish. Maybe he just needs a little bit of time to cool off.

If there's anything that scares Dave more than being comforted, it's being alone. Granted, he's been isolating himself intentionally. It's just easier to accept being alone when he's closing himself off from people, not the sick feeling of abandonment he gets when someone so much as leaves the room.

"I would rather do anything than sit here than talk in circles about how crap everything is." He remarks bitterly, scraping his teeth over his bottom lip before he moves to grab at her wrist. He isn't normally so quick to get tactile, but words can't describe how much he doesn't want her to walk out right now.

"Don't." It's one word, but he manages to weigh a lot of desperation in it. He lets her go quickly, he doesn't want to be an asshole and jerk her around. He brings his hand to his neck to rub awkwardly. "Please?"

The second Dave grabs her, Feferi stops. She's already halfway off the bed, but she turns to look at him, like a deer caught in headlights. She's not really sure what to make of all of this, but her heart aches for him, and for the fact that she can't figure out a way to get him to open up. She does so much better with people who tell her to just buzz off, but what this is that he's doing-- she's not very well equipped for it.

Finally her face softens. "Let's start with something small. Why don't we take a walk downstairs. Have you had anything to eat lately?"

He's relieved when she stops, but only briefly before he realises just how needy that reaction was. Her guess as to how to open him up is as good as his, because he's been attending camp conceal, don't feel for so long that anything else feels like a weird threat to his character.

The offer is nice, it's something to fixate on so he can pretend that didn't just happen. "Alright, awesome. Walking. I can do that." He says, not without a little sarcasm. In response to her question, he jerks a thumb at a crumpled corn chip packet and an empty juice bottle. "I just had breakfast." It is probably not breakfast time, nor is that breakfast.

"I meant real food." Like raw fish. She turns her wrist to take his hand, giving a little tug. "Come on then, up! Get that human heart pumping again and some blood flowing! Besides, our fans are probably getting low on fanfiction material, and I do not even want to think about what they'll just make up on their own when they run out."

Just like that, it's like nothing happened at all, already on the rebound with a smile and some excessively perky fins. Alright, maybe the fins are a little over the top, but she is trying. And if nothing else comes from a trip downstairs, it certainly won't hurt being seen together, not when she's coddling him and fawning over him and trying to get him to stop being such a lump of human.

Dave opens his mouth much like a fish to tell her just how real that food is, but he falls silent when she makes a grab for his wrist. Well, silent except for the grunt he lets out when she tugs him forward. He almost wants to protest and suggest that they just hang out in his room all day, but even he's starting to become aware of how stifling it is in here. Fresh air is usually over rated, food is not.

"Sure. I think the internet is ready for a few hundred Florence Nightingale themed stories in lieu of Alternate Universes where I'm a troll and you're a magical conch." Not that Feferi probably understands the references, but she's probably for it. He lets her lead him downstairs, wrist hanging limp like he's a balloon on a string. "Any plans or are we finning it?"

"Who?" She doesn't get his references, but she laughs it off anyway, mostly to humor him. She doesn't know what Florence Nightingale is or what it has to do with a magical conch shell, but whatever mental image she conjures up amuses her anyway. "Mmm, no plans! I figured we could just go down there and see what catches our eye!"

Or, her eye anyway. She leads the way with all her usual earnest energy, but she's still highly aware that he's hiding something from her. Even if she doesn't show it, it bothers her-- a lot. Very few things get to her like secrets do.

"Is there anything you are hankering for that is at least a little bit healthy? Potato chips and ice cream do not count!"

"She's, uh.." He starts, then he waves her off. "It's not funny if I explain it." He explains, unfunnily. He slouches along once they make it down to the lobby, looking pretty aimless since he has no idea what he's doing. It's nice to be out of his room, at least, it's definitely nice to be with Feferi. Even if he's worried that he's boring her, especially since he's worried he pissed her off with his little shit show.

He steps in a little closer, nudging his shoulder up against hers almost affectionately. It's as close to an appreciative hug as she'll get right now.

"Why don't I cut to the chase and say fish and make us both happy?" He raises a challenging brow at her.

"What, you think the only thing I like is fish?" She bats at his shoulder playfully, but she hasn't given him much reason to think otherwise. She still doesn't really know what humans like to eat though, so she's going to have to wing this one. "How about a nice salad? Humans like that kind of thing, don't they?"

They like to graze, right? She was planning to take him to the aquarium, but now that she's decided to feed him, she still wants to get out of the training center, so she starts leading him in that direction. There's got to be something out in the Capitol at large that he will eat and that's somewhat healthy.

"Yes." He answers curtly for the impact of doing so, twisting his shoulder dramatically as if she hit him that hard. His nose visibly crinkles at the suggestion, mouth twisting before he answers. "Nope, rabbits like that shit. Any human who claims otherwise is kidding themselves. Humans crave meat, like burgers or tacos or, well. I'm not sure meat is in hotdogs, but it's close enough."

Now he's hungry, really hungry, he doesn't want to admit as much but his stomach growls in anticipation while he reminds himself of everything he craves. "I want grease." He admits. "And cheese. And meat." He throws his head back so he can groan impatiently. "I'm weak, carry me." He doesn't mean it.

"None of those things sound healthy to me at all!" Not that Feferi is an expert on human cuisine. Her only frame of reference is that if he wants it, it's probably not good for him. "If I carry you, you are going to eat a salad. If you walk, we can go get these burgers of yours."

She'll settle though. She can be amicable and make a compromise. Exercise, or healthy food. Asking both is clearly just too much, but she's smiling anyway, so she's clearly not as frustrated as she's pretending to be. He makes it very hard for her to be firm with him, a problem that she's rarely had in the past.

"Burgers are healthy, they have lettuce and pickles and tomato.. sauce. And onions. It's just a constructed salad." A greasy, greasy salad. Why is he thinking in detail about this? He didn't even realise he was so hungry until she reminded him. Damn her womanly, trolly intuitiveness.

"That is a cruel ultimatum." He says, but he didn't honestly intend for her to carry him even if he doesn't doubt that she could easily do it. Instead of bitching, he moves to take her wrist and tug her forward so they can move a little faster. "I think I know a place that does them thisaway."

"It is tough love!" But she's too busy being dragged along, and she's just glad to see him getting some energy back. For a fleeting second, she wonders if she's going to regret this decision and should have agreed to fish instead, but if this is what he really wants, she will cope with it. She is such a good friend.

She has to jog a little to keep up with him-- tall people with their tall legs!-- so she lags behind by a bit, catching up in bursts. "Wait up for me! If I had known burgers were going to get you going like this, I would have tried them from the start."

Maybe she should have sugared him up with greasy food to begin with... something to consider for next time.

"It's something alright." He glances back at her, realising he's getting over eager and practically jogging toward the burgers like a hungry hippo. He slows, not relinquishing her wrist even as he does.

"I think you really hit the nail on the head with the whole eating thing." He points out, reluctant to admit that the half bag of doritos is probably the most he's had to eat in a long time. "Anyway, you'll love it. They serve ffff..." Fish burgers. "Fffood. And fries."

"Really? They serve food? Oh, I don't know if we should go there after all, that is just too appalling for me!"

She's bad at keeping the joke going, because she laughs straight after, but he's not fooling anyone, especially not her. He was going to say something about fish, she just knows it. She's still following along though, thankful for the adjusted pace.

"I think next time we go out, I will just attach a cart to you and let you drive," she follows up, as her only acknowledgment of thanks. "That way I won't even have to worry about keeping up. What do you think about that, could that be like, our first real romantic date?"

Edited 2015-02-15 01:45 (UTC)

"Yeah, food. It's revolutionary and you'll be sorry when it's 20 years later and everybody is eating food everywhere and shunning the nonbelievers." He needs to continue his commentary even when she starts laughing, but he's glad when she puts them on the express lane to another topic.

"Nothing says romance like turning your potential boyfriend into a cart mule." The word boyfriend rolls off his tongue a little too easily and it makes him a little uneasy. "Just put a burger on a string pole and hold it in front of me and we can go cross country." He pauses suddenly, swerving to the left and toward the door of a nice looking restaurant.

"Bam. We walk fast." Excuse him while he disregards any adoring fans and just beelines them both to a table. He flops into his chair and, like a gentleman, pushes her chair out with his foot.

Well, Feferi likes the idea, and she doesn't seem bothered by his choice of phrasing. Boyfriend doesn't mean as much to her. Any of her quadrants could be a boyfriend, really.

"A burger on a stick... I like that idea, thanks!" He thinks she's joking. She isn't joking. Well, maybe a little-- but not entirely.

As he pulls her through the door of the restaurant, she stops a moment to take a look around. She's never been here before, so she wants to get to know the place, but she doesn't want to lose him either. Following along, she slides into her seat, unawares of whatever breaches in human etiquette he might be making in the process. As soon as she's settled, she reaches her hands across the table, palms up, but doesn't say anything. She just... stares, expecting him to do something.

When Feferi doesn't question the choice of words, he takes it as an unspoken approval for them. Which it is, really, but he's forgotten that the term is different for her and they never did talk about quadrants.

"God, I'm hungry. How did you know I was hungry?" It was her idea to eat, after all. He's practically salivating at the mere concept of a burger and he turns to look at the specials on the board before looking back at Feferi and her outstretched hands. He raises a brow, not sure what she wants him to do at all.

He reaches for a menu and offers it to her sincerely. He isn't fronting, he's just confused.

City never sleeps so I guess I never slept on.

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