thecapitol | [Closed] I'm the shadow of every doubt

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[Closed] I'm the shadow of every doubt

Who| Jet and Albert
What| An argument leads to a blow up which leads to a conversation long in coming
Where| District 3, Albert's room for the most part
When| Post-Crowning
Warnings/Notes| Cyborg drama, language and arguments

The way Jet had grown up had left him craving attention from those around him. When he and Albert had first met, he'd been an angry teen yelling at a world that didn't even know he existed and any attention had been good attention, even when it really wasn't.

Being with Albert had changed that some. Jet had still always craved that attention, but it took less of it for him to be satisfied; even just a brush of hand along his arm or leg was enough to make the antsy teen settle down. During the time Jet had left his family, he'd learned to stifle that need, at least until he'd gained his work in the NSA as a secret agent, then he'd had a different kind of attention. But still, the time away had made him grow up a lot and part of that had been learning to make that insecurity behind wanting everyone's attention quiet down.

But that didn't mean he was perfect at it or that it didn't flare up from time to time. Like right now when Jet was walking into the room he shared with his fiance and didn't even receive a glance up. It wouldn't normally bother him...except this behavior was not new. Pretty much since Albert had proposed, he'd been planning their wedding and over the last few weeks since they'd woken up (and a bit before that) Jet had been virtually ignored whenever there was a wedding book around.

He got the day had been long and dedicated to the crowning and Albert had gotten nothing done but...it was becoming incredibly aggravating.

Jet moved over to the bed and stood to the side (there was no space for him, all available space was dedicated to piles of books) and waited for Albert to say something. Except he was too fidgety to wait long, every second those white eyes were on a page and not on him was another log to the growing fire of irritation. Jet wasn't good with being ignored.

"Hey, Al...you gonna be done with that soon?"

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He can see Albert's listening to him, actually listening to him and it makes something in his chest uncoil. No matter where else this conversation goes, he'll be happy as long as his words got through. And it seems they did. He listens back, waiting for Albert to be done saying his piece before Jet responded, they needed to this time, they had to listen to each other or this would haunt them like a shadow into their marriage and would only fester as time went on.

With Albert saying he might not always be all right, Jet's gaze softened, his hands squeezing his partner's tightly.

"I know that. I know it's not something I can fix-God knows if I could, I would-but I've helped you handle it so far, right? If I wasn't willing to keep helping, I wouldn't have said yes to marrying you. I told you on the roof that night that I'd take care of you for the rest of our lives and I mean that. Even when you can take care of yourself, I'll still be taking care of you...and when that darkness tries to creep in on you and take over everything, I'll work even harder to take care of you, got it?"

He sighed heavily, as though expelling the last bit of nervousness that always arose when they had a conflict between them and his eyes settled on the ring on Albert's finger.

"We're a team, right? Partners? That means we work together on every little obstacle, whether it's evil corporations, corrupt governments or a darkness that just needs to be put in it's damn place every now and then...you just gotta tell me when that one needs to happen and I'll pull out my guns."

His eyes left the ring and went back to those silver eyes across from him, all the love and affection, all the wonder and amazement, all the pride and joy he felt for his fiance there in his expression. While Albert may see Jet as a light source, the sun, Jet saw Albert as strength incarnate, he was the most precious thing in existence to the blond. The majority of the fuel that kept that warmth and light going. The heart to his soul.

"As long as you've got my back, Al, I've always got yours, no matter what bullshit gets thrown at us."

He breathes. Not just now after he's been holding his breath, but since he'd talked about this to Venus, since the night on the roof when the question had popped out of his mouth as something he's wanted so badly for so long and he'd felt too vulnerable to confront fully what binding themselves to each other could mean for Jet. That he would end up a care giver, that he might change.

But that's the thing, he's already changed and grown and apparently Albert has too. He's not just vulnerable, even if that's all he feels he is. He takes care of Jet too. Hadn't he laid out Ciro? Hadn't he honored Jet's request in the last arena despite it being one of the most difficult things he's ever had to do in his life? He didn't fall apart. Jet didn't either.

Neither of them are as fragile as all that.

Carefully, as if he's afraid of breaking the moment, Albert leans in and kisses Jet tenderly, one hand coming up to cup his fiance's cheek lightly. He's appreciative and affectionate, grateful for everything Jet has ever done from start to now, thankful that he should be so blessed to have his sparrow come singing into his life.

And blessed that he can return the favor and offer shelter to his own guardian angel.

Jet kisses back just as softly, his hand coming up to cover Albert's as he did. He could practically feel the tension leave his fiance and it made his own tension seep away. As long as Albert was happy, Jet was happy.

Jet pulled away, his eyes tracing over Albert's face lovingly, then he flung his arm out around the broader man's shoulders and knocked them both to the comforter. He shifted so he was half laying on his partner, chest to chest.

"Feel better? No cold feet?"

The eyes lingering along his face isn't something Albert misses. It's something he's noticed Jet does more consistently since the last arena. Looking. Observing. Appreciating his sight. It makes Albert want to pull him close and will away the fear he knows drives that action, but there's little he can do besides.

Before he can, though, Jet has him knocked to the bed, pulling a barking laugh from the older man. He pulls Jet against him so their hearts are close. "No cold feet. I never had doubts that I wanted to marry you, you know. Just worries about the other way around."

"Well neither did I, so you better cut that worry shit out." Never let it be said Jet was good at being a romantic, but he tried and the soft smile he said it with along with the lingering touch of his fingertips against Albert's chest were a better indication of his meaning.

Something that didn't escape Jet's attention, however, was that he had now gained what he'd been trying to achieve all night: Albert's undivided attention. He reached out to one of the books still on the bedspread and pushed it far enough over the edge that gravity did the rest resulting in a thunk as it hit the floor.

Light comprised of mischief and amusement danced in Jet's eyes as he looked back to Albert. "If we clear off the bed and I let you get more comfortable, will you hang out with me then?"

It was really all he wanted right this second, to have their limbs tangled together as they cuddled close, their heartbeats and breaths intermingling with how little room was between them. It was all he'd wanted before their argument...but with the last dregs of doubt leaving the air between them, Jet couldn't really feel disappointed it hadn't happened sooner.

"Alright," he sounds bemused in that pliant sort of way he always gets after they resolve an argument, willing to do whatever his partner suggests out of a sense of peace and companionship. And of course what he suggests sounds nice in its own right, even if he's manhandling the books in the process.

A quick peck to Jet's forehead and Albert rises to move all the books, including the one Jet had sentenced to exile on the floor, to the table against the wall. That task done, he returns to his fiance and lays out on top of the bedspread, head at the pillow and arm open and waiting to be filled with the American that belongs there.

Jet waited for Albert to settle and then he was right there filling the space that was his as he curled in Albert's embrace and pulled his partner into an embrace of his own. He pressed their foreheads together and his expression melted into one of content and affection. This was more like it.

A straying thought caught in his head and made that content expression change to one of amused annoyance as he pulled back a bit to get a better look at Albert.

"You never even apologized for ignoring me, jerk. You're not getting away with that this time."

He held himself back-though not fully out of Albert's embrace because he just couldn't do that-as though to make it clear the German couldn't have him until he'd 'earned' him back.

Jet was well aware he could count the number of times Albert had actually apologized when he was in the wrong on one hand (and the number of times Albert had been wrong were more than five) Albert was very good at getting away with that. He showed his apology through physical means or other words more often than not, but Jet's pride had been lightly bruised by being ignored and it needed tending to in the blond's opinion.

Edited 2014-10-17 05:11 (UTC)

Hadn't he? He thought he had, when Jet had come back and apologized for his part in it, hadn't Albert done so in turn? He wracks his brain trying to remember. He could have sworn... Is it really all that important? Even if he hadn't said the words, the emotions are there nonetheless and that's what counts.

He turns a bit, reaching with his other arm to pull Jet against him again. "I'm not ignoring you now, come here Sparrow."

Oh it's so tempting to just crawl back into those arms...he nearly does it, especially with his pet name added on the end...he was a sucker for that damn pet name.

But he just moves further away, sitting on the very edge of the bed, still sort of in reach, but far enough away to prove his point. He didn't know why it was so important, maybe because it was his pride, maybe because Albert almost never apologized or maybe because it had actually hurt, but he wanted to hear it this time.

"No, you're not, but I won't till you say it."

"What?" He can't fathom why it matters so much, but if Jet's going to be this way then-

Then who is he kidding? Apologizing isn't as if he's showing some kind of weakness. And even if it is, why should he mind showing weakness to someone who's already seen the weakest parts of him and seen them as strength? Wasn't that really what they'd just talked about?

"Alright, alright." He sits up a bit, resting his weight on one elbow so he can look Jet in the eyes. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't get so wrapped up in the planning of the thing that I forget the reason for the ceremony at all."

He leans in close, putting a hand to Jet's chin in order to guide him into a gentle kiss, if the blond will allow it.

Hearing the words assuages that part of Jet that was still offended and kept him from accepting Albert's affection. Even if this was the last time he'd hear such a thing for at least another decade, he'd take it.

Without hesitation, Jet turned and leaned into the kiss, turning it into a something a little sharper than gentle, but not too much, it still held the sweet affection he felt for his partner and the appreciation he had for the apology.

Jet climbed back onto the bed and curled back up with Albert, entangling himself once more with his forgiven fiance.

"...damn straight you did...I'm marrying your dumb ass because it's you, you know, not for the pretty decorations."

Albert hums a laugh into Jet's hair pulling him close and burying his face there happily. He feels lighter after they talk - really talk - that he has to wonder sometimes why they both seem so allergic to it. It's only a passing question though and soon forgotten in favor of letting his mind drift to their wedding again. Only this time, it's not the decorations or the cake or the clothes. It's just them, happily wed.

"Don't ever let me forget it." He kisses into gold tresses, reveling in the simply joy of just 'hanging out' with his partner.

"Not on your life. Now's the time to clear out, cause soon enough you'll be stuck with me forever, no matter what, got it? Then I'm never gonna let you forget what kind of trouble you signed up for."

A small smile traced his lips and one hand reached between them to curl into the fabric of Albert's shirt as though prompting him to stay while the other rested peacefully on his partner's back.

Jet was well aware of the amount of trouble he brought into Albert's life, surely the older man had reminded him enough times, a real hand-full, he'd been called. But he also knew there was only one person in existence worth more to him than anything else Jet could think of that made life worth living. And...by some miracle, that person wanted to stick at Jet's side too, it wasn't something Jet was going to let go of any time soon.

"Not on your life," Albert echoes, following it with a contented sigh. Jet is as much a part of his life as oxygen, now. He can't live without him, can't breathe without him. And while he's had his worries that perhaps that's too much pressure to weigh on one person's shoulders, Jet's maintained that he can bear it. Hell, he's proven as much.

The German's eyes fall shut as he shifts a bit into Jet's warmth, face still buried in his hair. They're going to be married, bound to each other until death do they part.

Only not even death will part them, not anymore. There's a strange sort of comfort in that.

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[Closed] I'm the shadow of every doubt

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