thecapitol | (no subject)

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(no subject)

Who| Kota and Starkiller
What| Kota runs into avox'd Starkiller
Where| Near the D3 suites
When| Sometime after Kota is brought to the capitol after dying in the Arena
Warnings/Notes| N/A

Even if you know it's going to happen, finding yourself waking up after death was a surreal experience. But now that he had gone through it, there was nothing else to do but to get up from his bed and see what this so called Capitol was all about.

And so he did. Once he was dressed, it didn't take him long after getting out to what appeared to be a main hall to find a familiar face. "Well, well..." he said to himself before going to approach him.

"Hey you! Boy!" it occurred to him then that he had no idea what the boy's name was. That was probably something to fix.

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Of all the people Starkiller expects to see, it isn't Kota. He hadn't even known the man was back, so seeing him is like seeing a ghost. He'd witness the man dragged away along with everyone else. Now he's back?

It makes no sense.

He's also the person Starkiller wants to see least, especially in this current condition, and with how he's feeling. It's hard not to think that he's at least partially responsible for what happened- if he hadn't tried breaking out of the arena, then maybe they wouldn't have punished district 3. With how this government works, it's not irrational to think so.

It's hard not to feel extremely guilty about it. Thousands of people dead, and he's partly responsible. Maybe not fully so, but partially. But there's nothing he can do about it, except stew in his misery and hope he can somehow fix things one day, somehow. But even thinking about that sends dread through him, thanks to the Capitol's drugged conditioning. A part of him regrets doing what he did, another part doesn't. It's both easy and difficult to hold onto his resolve and stand by what he did thanks to the drugs that broke him.

All of this adds up to not wanting to see Kota. It had been awkward and strange spending time with him while he was there, and now he's here permanently? He doesn't like it. He doesn't like it at all, and instead of doing what a good avox should and waiting to see what he wants, Starkiller forces himself to turn right around and walk in the opposite direction, pretending that he hadn't heard the man.

Now there's something that doesn't make sense. He knew the boy could hear. Unless things had changed that much since the last time they'd seen each other, there was no reason for him to ignore Kota.

So, wishing more than ever that he actually knew the kid's name, he followed the young man down the hall, only stopping to grab his arm once they're close enough. "Hey. I'm talking to you."

And I'm not talking back, he wants to say. But that isn't going to happen, because he can't. He also can't very well outright ignore someone for very long without it causing serious repercussions for himself.

So it's with frustration that Starkiller finally stops, when Kota grabs him. The touch makes him very uncomfortable, so he wriggles out of the grip quickly. His eyebrows furrow a little when he looks at Kota, annoyed- but he doesn't eye contact. This situation is too awkward for that, so he settles for looking at him but not in his face.

... Something isn't right. In fact, there's something very wrong with this picture. Even if this place had had an influence on Starkiller like that, it didn't make sense that he'd be so different now. Not for any reason that was completely related to Starkiller, anyway. He wasn't the type that would change that much without... Something. "What happened to you?" he finally asked, releasing Starkiller and looking at the boy with a mix of mild horror and utter confusion.

The frustration he feels when Kota asks that and he can't answer is overwhelming. All he can do is gesture towards his mouth, and then shrug. His movements are stiff and irritated, and he finally gives Kota a look that says leave me alone. Mostly because he can't communicate or he'll get in trouble, and because he just doesn't want to have to deal with the man.

Kota narrows his eyes at that. He understands pretty well what Starkiller means, and thus, realizes that it's useless to try and talk to him. But he still wants to know what the hell is going on. Of course, he remembers enough of his visit to Starkiller to know that going around asking is probably not the brightest move he could possibly do, so, reluctantly, he releases Starkiller and prepares to walk away. "We'll talk later."

Talk later.

He wonders if the man knows how insulting that really is to hear, considering he can't talk at all. At least not without getting them both in trouble. He really isn't looking forward to having to communicate with him later, either.

Maybe he ought to just get it over with now.

With a frustrated shake of his head, he taps Kota to get his attention, then gestures subtly for him to follow. If Kota complies, he's going to lead him to him to his old room in the suites, and from there to the bathroom inside of it after grabbing a pen and paper from the room.

An awkward place to meet, to be sure, but the bathrooms are, he thinks, the least monitored.

... Well, Starkiller finding a way to communicate worked too, as far as Kota is concerned. He followed Starkiller to wherever they were going; raising an eyebrow when he saw it was a bathroom. Really, was there no other place that wasn't closely monitored? Well, whatever, Kota had been in worse places.

Once they were both inside, and Starkiller was ready with his pen and paper, Kota leaned against the wall and asked again. "What happened?"

As he brings the pen to the paper to begin writing, he can't help but think nervously of how much trouble they would be in if they were caught. His palms get a little sweaty, but he ignores it. It's just the Capitol brainwashing, he can get past it. He has to, for his own sanity.

I attacked the force field with lightning. I was Avoxed as punishment.

Usually, Kota would ask what an Avox was, but with Starkiller right in front of him... It was fairly obvious. Kota was sure there was more to it than just losing your tongue, but he wasn't about to ask. If he was reading the situation correctly, Starkiller was at risk of punishment for doing what he was doing.

But still, there were questions that begged. "Is it permanent?"

Probably.

He doesn't know for sure, but he doesn't see why they would reverse the process. The idea makes his stomach twist into knots, but in front of Kota of all people he refuses to look weak, so he just stands there and waits for whatever next question might come.

Well, that was that, he supposed. There was really nothing he could do, and he wasn't stupid enough to ask around about what would happen to him, having seen what they do to people that didn't play by the rules.

Either way, things weren't looking very good for them. Now, Kota supposed it was a matter of him finding out as much as he could to avoid trouble. "What else should I know to survive this place?"

If Starkiller could, he'd be letting out a sarcastic sort of laugh. Does Kota really think asking the Avox how to survive this place is really the best thing to do? Starkiller can't do anything but shake his head in disbelief.

Are you really asking me? The Avox? You want advice? Don't be stupid. That's the best advice I can give you.

When Kota has read it, he tears the paper from the notebook and balls it up, moving over to flush it down the toilet, letting anger overtake him for a moment. This whole situation is just... hellish. He's getting tired of fighting the fear, this little discussion isn't going to be able to last much longer.

But he does have a few questions, so he needs to tough it out a little bit more. He moves back towards Kota, and this time when he writes his handwriting is a little shakier.

How long have you been back? What do you remember last?

That... Wasn't really what Kota had meant with his question, but he wouldn't press it. It served him right for asking it like that. In way, he supposed Starkiller's advice was just right for the situation.

And then the boy was asking a question himself. Kota tried to jog his memory. "I remember being here to visit you, more or less. I was still blind then. And then I was grabbed, sent... Who even knows where; next thing I know, I can see again, and they're throwing me in a room to judge how I fight. It's been... Almost four weeks, I think?"

Basically, Kota knew nothing of value. Starkiller closes his eyes and tries not to let himself feel too disappointed. He wishes that Kota could tell him of Juno and Proxy, but of course that wasn't going to happen. He isn't lucky like that.

I see.

It's getting to the point where he thinks he's risked enough with this encounter and so he decides to wrap it up.

If you have no more questions for me, then I should get back to my duties.

"Of course," Kota said, opening the door to leave first. He hesitated, as if he wanted to say or do something. But what could he do, really? He had no power in that place, so it wasn't like he could do anything for Starkiller.

In the end, he just started walking away.

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