Conscientia

[gamemakers]

WHO| Open
WHAT| Night life at the Speakeasy
WHEN| Evenings this week
WHERE| The Speakeasy
WARNINGS/NOTES| Feel free to use this party post style, or however you like if you would like to set any threads here.

The speakeasy was a classy joint. Wood panels, and soft velvet, and usually some kinda of live music, something mellow and easy to relax to. It was big, with low ceilings and with many back rooms, some easy to access, others less so. Easy to get lost in. And it gave off an air of class, of comfort, and being a part of something a little different from the rest. The kinda place where everybody knew your name, and everybody knew to be discreet about it.

It was the perfect place to grab a drink, sit, talk, and relax. No one over heard you, no one got in your business, but everyone was glad to talk if you wanted to find a friendly face. The owner, Conscientia, made her round every now and then, saying hello to her regulars, welcoming those who were new.

Comments

[setfires]

"If you mean that they like to have an excuse to use someone as an example...?"

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"Yeah, I don't want that either. I just don't want them to send me back where I came from and don't want them to get bored with me."

[setfires]

Cinna paused at that. "You don't want to go back?" he asked, curious at that because it was so different than what he was expecting Tributes to feel.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"Of course not." Howard gives Cinna a wary look, as if he's heard that response before and is convinced that people are just trying to make him doubt himself here. It's lonely, being one of the only people happy to be in the Capitol. Just him and Eponine relishing the showers and the snacks. "I have food here. Running water. Medicine."

He taps his front teeth. "They even fixed my smile. No more teeth rotting out of my head."

[setfires]

Cinna nodded, instantly re-thinking his approach with this one. "Then play with that angle. Tell the Capitol how grateful you are. They love being flattered."

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Howard squints. "Really? They think that's fun?"

He supposes he can see the power trip in watching someone fawn over you just to kill them on TV, but that's a bit too enormous and grotesque for him to picture the entire Capitol engaging in.

[setfires]

Cinna nodded. "If you appear to be thankful for what they've provided, they'll want you to survive to provide more. Who wants to sponsor someone they think is ungrateful?" he suggested.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"Love to hate types? I just..." He chews on a thread from the corner of his sleeve. "I don't want to be this pet that they keep around. And it feels like I'm a pet. Pets are disposable."

[setfires]

Cinna moved closer and put a hand on Howard's, trying to gently push his clothes away from his mouth. It was a natural reaction of his as a Stylist.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Howard jerks his hand away and jumps back, as if Cinna was a snake striking and not someone offering a gesture of consolation.

"Don't touch me, dude," he hisses.

[setfires]

Cinna held up his hands, clearly worried about giving the wrong impression.

"I apologize," he said sincerely. "It's... Don't chew on your clothes. Fashion is important to the people here, abusing it is going to give a bad impression."

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Howard pauses. He glances down at the sleeve, the little stain of spittle around where he was chewing it. "Oh. Right."

He looks nervous. "I can't help it. I chew."

[setfires]

"Nervous habits are okay," he said. "But try to keep them out of view when you're on camera."

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"We're always on camera. Or we're in public, which is basically the same thing." He sounds as if he believes trying to hide the nervous habits is going to backfire, but really, he doesn't know why he's arguing. Cinna knows more than he does, and all he has is his gut screaming at him that he's going to fail.

[setfires]

Cinna nodded. "What do you think that means about how you should behave? If you're always being watched, I mean?"

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"Don't slip up." But that's with everything, isn't it? The line between dying or not is so small here.

[setfires]

"Yes," Cinna replied. "Though I suggest you find people you can be yourself around, otherwise you might go mad."

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"And your idea for how I'd do that here would be what, a dating website?" Howard curls his lower lip, not an expression of disgust but definitely one of disquiet.

[setfires]

"No, I'm sorry. I wasn't able to find someone like that until recently myself. I wouldn't begin to know how to help you. Have you been getting along with the other Tributes?"

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"How well can you get along with people who have to knife you in the back every few weeks?" He reaches up to chew his fingernails, then manages to catch himself and pauses.

[setfires]

"It depends on how much you can compartmentalize."

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Howard frowns in confusion. "What's that mean? The word, I mean."

[setfires]

"It means mental making boxes to keep yourself in. Make more than one of you in your mind; the real you, the you in the Arena, the you in front of the cameras here. Keep them separate, and protect the real you at all costs."

Cinna's tone of voice was very conversational, but what he was saying revealed a deep truth of himself. He was excellent at this, and it was very rare for people to know the 'real' him.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Howard looks a little distracted as he listens, but the truth is that he's listening very closely. He's never heard of doing this before but he knows he's engaged in it himself in the past.

But then again, he doesn't really have any idea who the 'real' him might be. Just this distorted idea of a person going through various traumas - he has little to no idea what's him and what's just reactions to stress.

"Thanks. I should, um." He gestures to the people. "I should mingle. You know. Thanks for this."

[setfires]

"It's the least I could do. Good luck. If you need help and there's something I can do, let me know."