[Closed] All we are is entertainment

[silberfuchs]

WHO| Jet, Albert, Jet's parents
WHAT| Albert reacts poorly to his exposé and Jet's dad suffers for it.
WHEN| Immediately after Albert's exposé airs
WHERE| Jet's District 2 suite
WARNINGS| Bilingual swearing, homophobia, talk of death, violence, abuse, thoughts of patricide (patr-in-law-icide?)


The music fades out and some commercial for body wash or something comes on, the cheery colors playing across Albert's utterly unreadable expression. He's silent and stalk still, standing with a rigidity that he hasn't had since he'd been mostly mechanical. It's nearly unnatural; it would be completely if he wasn't practically crushing the remote in one hand.

A moment later and he's thrown the damn thing against the far wall, the abrupt impact popping off the battery casing and landing on the volume button so the common area is suddenly silent. He whirls and retreats into Jet's room, a ball of silent and cold fury.

They made a mockery of him, of his life. Nevermind the implications of how they came by any of the footage, they'd taken the most painful and difficult experiences he'd ever been through, spun them in the most disgustingly vulgar contrivances, and put them on display under the umbrella of entertainment. He had been kidnapped, experimented on, remodeled, killed, tortured, made to do unspeakable things, but this, this is the most violated he's ever felt.

They hadn't even gotten Hilda's name right.

With an explosive shout of German profanity, Albert sends his foot into the wall, drywall cracking and buckling under the sudden strike. The worst part is that those things had happened. Not in the way the narration had said, hardly, but he'd taught children to fight, he'd gotten his fiancee killed, he'd...

Had Jet really turned into a somnua? Was that something that had happened before Mocawa?

Feeling dizzy and sick with rage, Albert leans forward to rest his forehead against his arm on the wall, breathing raggedly. "Himmel, arsch und Zwirn..."

Comments

[metalicarus]

The chill through the towel bites into his skin but is quick to numb the throbbing in his mouth and jaw.

His hand raises to hold the ice pack in case Albert wanted to let go and do whatever else, but his eyes stay on the German's chest while his mind fights to stay blank.

But it doesn't succeed.

Everything is there, everything that's happened even back to His Voice and being betrayed by Void. Every little thing he felt, all the anger and sadness and helplessness, every anxiety that twisted him up and made him want to scream and be sick at the same time refused to be ignored or shoved away.

Maybe it was thanks to having come face-to-face with the very thing that had ever made him feel that angry and that helpless, but none of what he'd buried was going away now.

Tears blurred his vision and fell hot against his face, like that inferno he'd carried for so many months had turned to liquid and chosen to fall from his eyes. He didn't try to fight it. Not this time. If there was going to be someone who would see him at his weakest, he'd choose his partner who'd already seen every other bad angle of the blond.

[silberfuchs]

In all the years they'd spent together, Albert had only seen Jet cry once. It had been understandable then too, with his partner having only just woken up after nearly a month in a coma to a new face in the mirror. That Albert had understood all too well and he'd curled his arms around Jet to weather the tide.

Now he does the same, brushing one hand back through golden strands before encircling his finace in a secure embrace. Maybe he doesn't understand quite so well this time, but he does at least know when his partner needs him close and solid. It also helps that he can bury his face in Jet's hair this way to hide his own expression of worry and protectiveness. If Jet is going to cry, better to let him get it out, but it digs at Albert sharply that his partner is in enough pain to be so vulnerable and he can do so little about it.

"It's alright," he repeats in what he hopes is a steady, soothing voice. Fingers trace through Jet's hair and brush against the back of the taller man's neck, cradling and protective. He hopes it helps, hopes this all helps to relieve the anger he's known Jet carried since the day they met. Since before they met. "It's alright."

What else can he say?

[metalicarus]

The hand with the ice pack drops for the time being so Jet can curl his free hand into the fabric over his fiance's back and press his face into Albert's shoulder. Even with the fragments of shame that accompany the tears, he feels comfort from the protective hold he's wrapped in.

So he lets himself cry, sob and cling to his partner because if there's one safe place to do it, it's here in Albert's arms.

It lasts longer than he can ever remember crying and there are still tears slipping down his face even after the sobs shaking his shoulders have died down, but he's quiet again and the tears continue soaking Albert's shirt.

It takes him a moment or two to realize once he's calmed down, but the vast emptiness he feels is hard to ignore. It wasn't a gnawing emptiness like the one that had threatened to tear him apart when he'd learned of Albert's death, it was calm and painless. It was the space where all of his anger had roiled and raged before, it wasn't all gone, there were still traces here and there, but it was latent like maybe how a normal person without anger issues would feel. Maybe.

There was one thing he definitely knew about it, though and that was that it went deeper than just the inferno he'd clung to, it was the anger he'd held from long before then as well. It was everything and now there was this emptiness waiting to be filled with some other emotion, leaving him feeling lighter than he'd even thought possible.

The first emotion to leak into this new-found space was fierce affection, adoration and gratitude for the German still holding him close. He wanted to kiss every inch of him for being willing to just stand there and let Jet fall apart on him like some kid, but he just turned his drying face to bury it in the older man's neck.

"Sorry. That was pretty pathetic."

[silberfuchs]

"I won't tell." He'd rather explain that it's not pathetic, that it had been years upon years of pent up rage and betrayal at the man who had been supposed to guide him, love him, and instead had failed him so grossly that Albert's even more impressed now that Jet isn't more messed up than he is. But he knows Jet, knows that it's still a battle to undo the idea that showing emotion is the same as showing weakness - hell, he's terrible at differentiating the two himself - and he's too tired himself to have that discussion.

"You've seen me fall apart enough times, I think you earned a go," he says it with a little smile, deprecating but affectionate as he turns his head and presses a kiss into Jet's temple. "Do you feel better?"

[metalicarus]

"Yeah." It was surprising, he didn't actually expect to feel better after something like that, but the lighter feeling in his chest was definitely more relieving than anything else.

He pulled away finally and wiped his sleeve along his face to try and clear it, though his cheeks and eyes were still stained red from the salt. There was a wave of shyness that sent his eyes to Albert's shirt and no higher as he pressed the ice pack to his face again. "I'm tired." It was hardly anything close to what Jet would label as 'late at night' and yet he felt like he could sleep for the next twelve hours at least. It probably had something to do with stress and displays of emotion and a bunch of other junk he wasn't going to try and process right now.

Right now, he just wanted to stay near Albert, a feeling expressed in the way the hand that had been clutching at the German's back was now curled in the fabric at his waist instead.

[silberfuchs]

"Then let's get to bed." Early or not, they're both drained from the day and with the Capitol lifestyle being one of excess, he doubts their presence anywhere will be missed. Even if it would be, it's hardly something that matters.

Pulling Jet with him gently, Albert moves them to the bedroom, for once not even noticing that the Avox had been through to straighten everything while they were out. He sets the blond down first, hands never far from Jet even as Albert changes for bed, visiting soft kisses and gentle touches between handing his partner the soft, loose pants provided for sleeping in. Apparently the Avox had stopped being in denial about Albert's staying here and left two pairs for their use.

[metalicarus]

Jet returned every touch and kiss with one of his own, more than welcome to any contact with his partner.

Once they were both changed and ready for bed, he curled into Albert's side as soon as he was allowed to.

"Al...thanks. For sticking with me." Not just through the crap of the last couple weeks, but through everything, all the bull Jet knew he brought into his fiance's life. He doubted he'd ever get why Albert stayed with him, but he was grateful for it nonetheless.

[silberfuchs]

"Always." Another kiss gets pressed to Jet's head, Albert's arms around his fiance as if he could keep him eternally safeguarded just with the embrace. Jet doesn't have to thank him for things he does in regards to his partner. They're things he does gladly, especially when it's something as important and potentially life changing as this.

Already Jet seems more light, unburdened by things that had plagued him for far too long. Albert definitely doesn't regret punching Ciro in the nose; it was less than he deserved for putting Jet through even a fraction of what Albert had witnessed here in the Capitol.

Frankly, he wishes he could do it over again.

"Etwas Schlaf zu bekommen." He breathes the words softly into Jet's hair, knowing his partner doesn't understand them but that they'll likely be heeded regardless with the blond already curled into his side and limp with fatigue. He may have never known it before, but Albert's often muttered soft words to Jet in German. Their translators had always made it understandable and since then he'd elected to use English so as not to frustrate Jet in lacking comprehension. But he'd been teaching his fiance a little and there's something in how the German feels rolling from his tongue that makes it seem all the more protective.

[metalicarus]

His arms slip around the broader frame of his fiance and he sighs contentedly as the German words fell to his ears. He didn't know what they meant, but the tone was soothing and every fiber of Albert's being spoke love and protection to Jet's and that was plenty enough for him.

His lips found Albert's shoulder before he settled in and his eyelids grew heavy. "G'night, Al." The words 'I love you' were there on his tongue but his mind was already slipping into sleep, leaving his hold and touch to carry on the message his lips didn't.