lord have mercy

[sleeplessinalternia]

Who| Karkat and OPEN
What| After nearly half a sweep a year away, Karkat's back in the tribute tower. He's not happy about it.
Where| D1 suite, elsewhere in tribute tower, in the capitol itself
When| Week 6 and beyond
Warnings/Notes| I'll be putting up some prompts in the comments for the three locations, but otherwise feel free to make your own wildcard prompt! JSYK, Karkat has been revived a week or so after he died (roughly concurrent to when Kankri got resurrected from his) and looks roughly a year older than he was last time anybody saw him. As for warnings... there will be language, probably references to Karkat's death and a little bit of Homestuck spoilers.



Familiar overhead block surface.

Karkat blinks his occular orbs in dismay. He-- he fucking knows this place. Memories come flooding back. Panem. He's in fucking Panem. Held captive by the fucking Capitol humans. Here he was, half-a-sweep older, and now, now, he knew what a fucking travesty that really was.

"We made you," he mutters under his breath. "You should be worshipping us, not fucking turning us into reality television."

There's a paper container of mixed goods next to him on the resting platform. Karkat shakes it out onto the thermal retention fabric. A bottle of what proved to be some kind of artificial scent. A hat in the shape of a gelatinous sea creature. Rubber bouncing spheres in the shapes of his, Signless, and Kankri's heads. A pendant with an enameled picture of a hamburger on it. Gummy candies in the shape of hamburgers. A black shirt with the word DEAD written in his own blood color. A toy figure of himself whose head came off when you squeezed it.

Karkat stares down at the assorted goods. "What the fucking fuck?"

Comments

[sleeplessinalternia]

Karkat rolls his eyes. "Fine, whatever. The point is, there was no frogsex going on."

[tis_allgood]

"Worry not, Grasshopper, I'm certain there are other little, slimy animals that will find you very attractive and take you to bed." Bert teases. He knows what Karkat means but he hasn't seen him in a spitting rage in far too long.

[sleeplessinalternia]

"I don't pail amphibians!" Karkat snaps. "I don't even know if I want to pail mammals! Jegus fuck, Bert, is me pailing things the only thing you ever think of?"

[tis_allgood]

There, that's more like it!

"Certainly not. I think of other trolls pailing things on occasion and I also think about you sitting alone in your room chirping to no one in particular. But that last one makes me just terribly sad, so I try not to think of it so much."

[sleeplessinalternia]

There are some situations in which words are not sufficient.

Karkat stomps on Bert's foot instead.

[tis_allgood]

"Ow! You flirt!"

Bert is amused, but he would be even more amused if that didn't hurt so much. He doesn't retaliate, though, he doesn't want the peacekeepers to have to break them up.

[sleeplessinalternia]

"Yeah, well, it's your fault for fantasizing about me-- chirping alone." Karkat has a pretty good fucking clue what that's supposed to be a euphemism for.

[tis_allgood]

"Is that not what all the sad little crickets do? Or have I once again stumbled onto some phrase that means more than I think."

He gives Karkat a sideways glace. He had just assumed that chirping alone was a good phrase for something trolls without friends do.

[sleeplessinalternia]

"It doesn't mean more than you think," Karkat replies huffily, "I just know the things you like to insinuate. And I'm not a fucking cricket, dipshit."

[tis_allgood]

"Cry your pardon, grasshopper. I meant no disrespect by it."

Maybe Karkat really has grown up if he's not going to throw a hissing spitting fit over this.

[sleeplessinalternia]

"Or a grasshopper," Karkat adds irritably. It's more that his fit-throwing threshold has been raised, Bert. Give him time.

[tis_allgood]

"Well you're no fucking butterfly! I've seen trolls with wings. And unless you're hiding them up your waste chute, you've no wings that I've ever seen."

Without his nicknames, Cuthbert is nothing. He will find one and make it stick.

[sleeplessinalternia]

"Why do you have to even compare me to a human insect at all?" Karkat protests. "Can't I just be a fucking troll?"

[tis_allgood]

"Do you not understand the value of a nickname? For humans 'tis a gesture of familiarity and love."

Bert doesn't know how to make it any clearer. Except maybe: "And I certainly care for thee... beetle."

[sleeplessinalternia]

"Oh," Karkat says, suddenly studying his shoes. "I hadn't-- I thought it was just you being a dick again. I mean, we do have nicknames and fuck, we even use them that way. I just--"

He looks up at Bert. "I care for you too... monkey."

[tis_allgood]

"Of all the openings I give you, that's the best you can do? I could think of a dozen better nicknames!"

But just so the moment isn't entirely ruined, he ruffles Karkat's hair and taps his finger against one stubby horn.

[sleeplessinalternia]

Karkat lets him. "Shut up, you're as much a naked pink monkey as I'm a beetle."

[tis_allgood]

"Picturing me naked, are you?"

Sorry, Karkat, Bert often hears only what he wants to hear.

[sleeplessinalternia]

Yeah, that's going to get Karkat to jerk his head out of Bert's hands.

"No! I meant that you have less hair than other monkeys! Oh my fucking lord, Bert, you're incorrigible."

[tis_allgood]

"Then stop encouraging me."

He is only slightly saddened by the loss of a Karkat to pet. He will pout all the same, though.

[sleeplessinalternia]

Karkat glares at him for the pun. "You encourage yourself."

[tis_allgood]

"Often. But I also encourage you, do I not?"

He won't deny that he eggs himself on when no one else will.

[sleeplessinalternia]

"That's one word for it," Karkat replies, rolling his eyes.

[tis_allgood]

"If that's how you take it, mayhap I'll keep my encouragement to myself from now on."

Bert put his hands on his hips, teasing.

[sleeplessinalternia]

Karkat rolls his eyes again. It's his stupid destiny, he guesses, to provide Cuthbert Allgood a straight man. "I'm sure you can get all the encouraging you need that way."

He's not entirely sure where this conversation is going anymore. This happens a lot with Cuthbert.