Bucky Barnes ☆ adorable trainwreck manpain (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
soldieronwards) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
thecapitol2014-10-03 01:03 am
soldieronwards) wrote in thecapitol2014-10-03 01:03 am
Entry tags:
Something causing fear to fly,
Who| Bucky Barnes (616), Steve Rogers, and anyone else.
What| An increasingly unstable man broods in some rather unhealthy ways, but fortunately he also catches up with friends.
Where| On the roof of the training center and in the District 9 common area.
When| Backdated to shortly before the blackout.
Warnings/Notes| Some discussion of suicidal thinking, probable discussion of violence.
[PROMPT ONE: OPEN]
He doesn't want to dwell much on what happened when he realized Natasha hadn't come back after her death in the Arena.
He might have punched an Avox. He thinks he probably punched an Avox. The thought fills him with a distant shame; these are people who've already been debased and horrifically abused by the Capitol, and he brings more violence upon their person? That's really just the kind of guy he is, though. After that, he probably stalked through the halls for a while, trying to find Natasha somewhere else, trying to deny that her not being here was real. He thinks at some point he went downstairs and waited in the lounge for a bit, drinking and people-watching, sure that she would walk by any second.
But he doesn't feel quite present again until he finds himself on the rooftop, on the edge of the rooftop, staring down. He knows there's no point in jumping. There's a forcefield there. But--
(Still, he thinks about it. He thinks about how easy it would be if there wasn't that field there. He thinks about how it would be nice to not have to deal with the torrent of wrongness that is his mind and heart right now. Right now? No, he's thinking that it's more like all the time, when she isn't there to keep him grounded.)
He stands there quietly, his face expressionless, his eyes dark and distant.
[PROMPT TWO: CLOSED TO STEVE ROGERS]
But although Bucky Barnes is a reckless man, although he is often foolish and driven by his faulty heart, he is also a pragmatic one. Eventually, he makes his way to the common area of District 9's level in the training center, and he waits there on a sofa.
He probably gets the occasional strange look for being outside of his own level. He shakes those glances off. He's waiting for someone more important than any of them.
What| An increasingly unstable man broods in some rather unhealthy ways, but fortunately he also catches up with friends.
Where| On the roof of the training center and in the District 9 common area.
When| Backdated to shortly before the blackout.
Warnings/Notes| Some discussion of suicidal thinking, probable discussion of violence.
[PROMPT ONE: OPEN]
He doesn't want to dwell much on what happened when he realized Natasha hadn't come back after her death in the Arena.
He might have punched an Avox. He thinks he probably punched an Avox. The thought fills him with a distant shame; these are people who've already been debased and horrifically abused by the Capitol, and he brings more violence upon their person? That's really just the kind of guy he is, though. After that, he probably stalked through the halls for a while, trying to find Natasha somewhere else, trying to deny that her not being here was real. He thinks at some point he went downstairs and waited in the lounge for a bit, drinking and people-watching, sure that she would walk by any second.
But he doesn't feel quite present again until he finds himself on the rooftop, on the edge of the rooftop, staring down. He knows there's no point in jumping. There's a forcefield there. But--
(Still, he thinks about it. He thinks about how easy it would be if there wasn't that field there. He thinks about how it would be nice to not have to deal with the torrent of wrongness that is his mind and heart right now. Right now? No, he's thinking that it's more like all the time, when she isn't there to keep him grounded.)
He stands there quietly, his face expressionless, his eyes dark and distant.
[PROMPT TWO: CLOSED TO STEVE ROGERS]
But although Bucky Barnes is a reckless man, although he is often foolish and driven by his faulty heart, he is also a pragmatic one. Eventually, he makes his way to the common area of District 9's level in the training center, and he waits there on a sofa.
He probably gets the occasional strange look for being outside of his own level. He shakes those glances off. He's waiting for someone more important than any of them.
no subject
He's just starting to feel Bucky was gone when he sees the man on the couch as he returns to his floor. The relief he feels is palpable, but it's short lived knowing the other man has lost Natasha because of Steve's actions.
"I was just looking for you."
no subject
It should be a joke. He should deliver it with a grin and a flash of here-and-gone-again laughter in his voice. But his words are flat, and his smile barely touches his mouth, let alone his eyes.
There's no blame in that gaze, though. All that's there is a sort of flinty calm. His eyes are brown, not grey, but somehow right now they look a lot like dense fog, muffled and dull and heavy.
"You found out she's gone."
no subject
Still, he gives a nod to the statement.
"Yeah," he puts his hands on his hips and looks down. "Started to think you were too, hoped I was wrong about her as well. Wishful thinking I suppose."
He looks up at the man again, his expression of understanding as he gives his condolences, "I'm sorry to hear it."