"I'll try." He answers in the most reassuring way he can. Last time he had attempted that it came off as nothing more than a thinly veiled farewell. There's only so much they can plan out regarding the arenas, but he's serious when he says he'll try. "And you stay close to Clem." He doesn't say that to merely echo Luke, but he means it, with a firm level of protectiveness an older sibling would have. They've bonded a lot more recently, more then they did with the time they had back at home. That girl has done more for him than he deserves and if there's anyone of them that deserves to make it out, it ought to be her.
A long sigh escapes him, torn between feeling hopeful or resigned to being caught in this cycle. One of them could slip sometime and end up killing other people. Nick had done it before. What if he actually ends up losing it? At what point is he going to end up being able to savagely beat someone, a person - not a wall or a pillow, into a bloody mess without even batting an eye? Maybe the reason why he agreed to the whole crazy idea was to see if he could avoid that from getting closer to happening.
Nick had expected some sort of argument that he's wrong for not blaming Luke for anything. If there's one other thing they had in common it's the tendency to take the blame while the other would protest otherwise. It had been a thing since they had known each other. To not face an argument about this for once should be a relief but Nick feels anything but.
It tells him a lot about his friend's state of mind right now, and taking it in has never made him feel more useless.
He picks up his drink again and finishes it, glancing over to Luke. He remembers telling Clem that people change along with the whole god damn world. With how much he knows Luke has been bottling up, he also knows there are only so many things he could distract himself with before...Nick doesn't know. He only feels that the more Luke tries to be a leader, the less of a friend he can be for him. Nick has to prove that he can be dependable. At least let him be able to make that happen.
Not knowing what to say anymore but also not wanting to leave, he stands up to put his arm around Luke's shoulder, a gesture not unfamiliar for them both by now. The gentle squeeze he gives is a mixed bag of don't worry about me and I'm sorry. The look he gives though, eyes tired but still wide awake, says I'm still here.
no subject
A long sigh escapes him, torn between feeling hopeful or resigned to being caught in this cycle. One of them could slip sometime and end up killing other people. Nick had done it before. What if he actually ends up losing it? At what point is he going to end up being able to savagely beat someone, a person - not a wall or a pillow, into a bloody mess without even batting an eye? Maybe the reason why he agreed to the whole crazy idea was to see if he could avoid that from getting closer to happening.
Nick had expected some sort of argument that he's wrong for not blaming Luke for anything. If there's one other thing they had in common it's the tendency to take the blame while the other would protest otherwise. It had been a thing since they had known each other. To not face an argument about this for once should be a relief but Nick feels anything but.
It tells him a lot about his friend's state of mind right now, and taking it in has never made him feel more useless.
He picks up his drink again and finishes it, glancing over to Luke. He remembers telling Clem that people change along with the whole god damn world. With how much he knows Luke has been bottling up, he also knows there are only so many things he could distract himself with before...Nick doesn't know. He only feels that the more Luke tries to be a leader, the less of a friend he can be for him. Nick has to prove that he can be dependable. At least let him be able to make that happen.
Not knowing what to say anymore but also not wanting to leave, he stands up to put his arm around Luke's shoulder, a gesture not unfamiliar for them both by now. The gentle squeeze he gives is a mixed bag of don't worry about me and I'm sorry. The look he gives though, eyes tired but still wide awake, says I'm still here.