There's a pause, a heavy, stifling pause while Howard swallows again. "But I don't want to die."
And then he asks himself why it took so long to say that. He tells himself it's because he's scared of Aunamee, scared of speaking up against the man who stuck him with holes. And he tries not to think about how disappointed he was to wake back in the Capitol. How much he wanted to escape, not by foot but by retreating into himself until there was nothing left, where there wouldn't be a knife anymore, where there wouldn't be sensitive human nerves to even feel one.
"You didn't have to draw it out..." He feels his throat seize and lunges for a nearby trash can. If he was going to say anything, it's forgotten as he expels Aunamee's gift dinner (the milkshakes, sandwich, pasta, oatmeal, bread rolls, everything else). A Capitol citizen watching across the street gets out a camera phone, and he's vaguely aware of it enough to make an ignored gesture for them to go away.
no subject
And then he asks himself why it took so long to say that. He tells himself it's because he's scared of Aunamee, scared of speaking up against the man who stuck him with holes. And he tries not to think about how disappointed he was to wake back in the Capitol. How much he wanted to escape, not by foot but by retreating into himself until there was nothing left, where there wouldn't be a knife anymore, where there wouldn't be sensitive human nerves to even feel one.
"You didn't have to draw it out..." He feels his throat seize and lunges for a nearby trash can. If he was going to say anything, it's forgotten as he expels Aunamee's gift dinner (the milkshakes, sandwich, pasta, oatmeal, bread rolls, everything else). A Capitol citizen watching across the street gets out a camera phone, and he's vaguely aware of it enough to make an ignored gesture for them to go away.