thecapitol | What pretty cheeks they have, what pretty frocks they have!

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What pretty cheeks they have, what pretty frocks they have!

Who| Luna and you!
What| Luna tries to adjust to Panem. It's a little much, to say the least.
Where| Around the Capitol, then various places in the Training Center
When| Today
Warnings/Notes| None currently.

The Capitol
When Luna's taken to the suites and left to ponder her future, she doesn't know what to do. Waking up from what she knew had been her death, hearing she was going to be participating in another game, being expected to kill others as part of that game...she can't go through with all that again, she just can't. It's not long before she starts to feel a need for something more open - fewer walls, more nature if she can find it. Her body feels heavy and alien too, and the thought of staying inside makes her chest hurt. Leaving the Training Center makes her anxious too, but there are no locked doors on the way out and she knows there are people outside, she'd seen them as she was being escorted by the Peacekeepers. So when she steps outside...

It's almost overwhelming. All the colors, all the noise, all the people. Luna's only seen scenes like this in old records, and experiencing it for real is astounding - and intimidating. Curiosity wins over timidness but just barely, so she wanders the streets trying to stay out of people's way (difficult, given the bustling streets) and glances at colorful displays with a mixture of admiration and hesitation. She's not yet sure she's ready to go inside anywhere; shyness has been her cover before, but now the truth of it is coming back to bite.

Training Center (gym, rooftop, District 6 suites)
Eventually Luna returns to the Training Center, because she can only stay outside for so long. She stops by the training sublevel first, quickly recognizing how out of place she is among the people gathered. The gym is for people who want to improve themselves and increase their chances at survival and victory. Survival is something that appeals to Luna, but victory...isn't. She lingers there a little longer, just to observe and maybe talk with one or two people, but it's not too long before she goes exploring further.

And while the Training Center makes her uneasy, the rooftop doesn't. Even the Capitol doesn't have a lot of nature, so when she looks around and browses the gardens something in her heart settles down a little. She spends a while sitting near the edge of the roof looking down at the city below, and thinking of happy things. The whirlwind of life in the Capitol, the freedom of leaving the facility, surviving on her own outside. The fact that she's alive at all to see this right now. Not dying alone, but getting to be with...

When Luna starts crying, she takes that as her cue to leave. As far as she knows she's alone, but she could have missed something and she doesn't want anyone to see her like this right now. She sticks around for a few moments longer to compose herself, and then starts to head back down to the District 6 suites to see who else is there. It seems that she's going to be here for a while longer, after all. She'll need to figure out what she can do in the days ahead.

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When Kyle arrived in Panem Sigma was unable to tolerate grief - it sapped the strength from his bones and made him a slave. When Phi is sent before him he must ease himself into a seat, but it is easy to summon his patience. By the time Luna has arrived he has shut the door behind his former self.

Yet he finds himself, somehow, en route to the Tribute Tower in an armored car, too late to hope to see her. In reaching the rooftop he realizes he's made a mistake. Luna is alone, poised above the horizon like a bird before flight. She seemed to be at peace with her freedom, perfectly content, and who was he to take her from it? Satisfied that all is well, he has almost turned to leave when she begins to cry.

For the first time in his life Sigma understands that there are people the world was better off without, and that he is among them.

He becomes a shadow in the garden door, unable to move or breathe. Why had he come in the first place? He knew before he'd arrived that this was all outside of his control. Perhaps they were a cursed pair, fated to meet wearing one skin or another, but unable to connect. The two of them parents, having never parented. Wholly loving one another but not in love.

He's still considering this when Luna's body turns towards the exit, directly in his line of sight. To turn away would sever her from him and set them free, but it would be the ultimate betrayal.

And Sigma does not have the strength to betray her again.

"Luna."

Of all the things Luna's expecting to see when she turns around, this is not one of them.

"Sigma!" The name escapes her mouth before she can say it, out of shock. And then more quietly, "Um...Doctor."

Because chances are, this is the Sigma Klim she's known most of her life. Luna's seen him before, unmistakably one of the Gamemakers she'd been put before upon arrival. That seems like a role the Doctor would have. She's even guessed that this might be part of some plan of his that she was necessary for, a continuation of the project after her death. It's probably his doing that she's here at all - it would certainly explain why she's here when she ought to be gone forever. Sigma had created her and Sigma could have retrieved her data far after her wipe, based on something he'd heard in a different timeline. Just like he'd known to find her in the garden earlier...and now, it seems. That thought almost makes Luna tear up again, although she's able to fight it back this time.

She doesn't know all the details about Sigma's abilities let alone his plans for the project, and so she doesn't know if he remembers their time in the botanical garden. She's selfish to hope that he does. But still, Luna can't help it when a bit of that hope leaks into her voice as she speaks again.

"What are you doing here? Is there something you need?"

When Luna calls his name it feels like a case of a mistaken identity. She wanted the vibrant Sigma Klim, full of youth and energy, to tell her that everything was okay when it was not. This was a person Sigma knew, deep down, still existed - but he could not show his true colours in Panem. It was long before he had taken up Gamemakership that he noticed his name and title were shorthand for "kind" and "cruel," and it was not without reason.

He feels a little foolish stepping out of the shadows in an important-looking Capitol costume, but his embarrassment is eased when he remembers Luna would not care. He summons the confidence to approach her until she asks her question, where he stops at a comfortable distance. Of course she would think that - he had only come to her when he had needed something. Raise my child, play my game, do my bidding, until you break. Until you cannot take any more and end up here. He was no fool - there was but one Luna who would have such a reaction, and she was a Luna who died.

"I..." For the first time between them he finds himself at a loss for words. He considers using an excuse, but after losing Akane and Kyle so abruptly, it doesn't seem right. "I was concerned. I imagined such a transition would come as a great shock to you." The words I've missed you and I wanted to see you are kept safe behind his teeth. He may have remembered how to love, but he is not so cruel as to paint a target on her forehead.

"...You may call me Sigma, if you wish," he adds casually, almost an afterthought. "Most do. My doctorate carries little meaning, here." There were other titles with which people addressed him, of course, like Zero and Gamemaker, but he would not like for her to use those.

"Sigma." The name feels mismatched as Luna says it out loud. She'd come to think of him that way after their time together as players in the Nonary Game, but now she's just a GAULEM in his service again. It doesn't seem quite right for her to use his name like that, but if he says it's all right she's not going to question him. The Sigma she played the game with and the Sigma in front of her now are the same person, after all, even if she can't tell yet whether he remembers the same timeline she does - at least, with the same clarity that she does. It's okay if he doesn't, really, because she'd never expected to be so close to him before the game anyway. And there are so many timelines, it's silly to expect him to remember them all so vividly.

Still, the fact that he's concerned at all is some comfort to her. It's enough that Luna feels the confidence to make her next request, although despite herself she can't help but fall back into her usual "obedient GAULEM" role a little bit. "I do have many questions, Doc...Sigma." She still has to remember to use his name. "I was never briefed regarding the current situation, nor was I debriefed on the execution of the project. Um--if I may say so, I would very much like to know what's going on."

The request is politely worded, but there's a certain edge to Luna's voice that makes her feelings clear, as much of a demand as her timid disposition will allow. Why was all of that necessary? Why am I here, now? Why are there more games? She isn't sure Sigma wants to give her those answers, with how she's been denied access to classified information all her life, but after everything she's been through she's certainly going to give her best shot all the same.

Sigma finds himself unexpectedly satisfied by Luna's frustration. Yes. Get angry! Anyone with a heart would surely rail against what he's done. He knew Luna could be as defiant as her human counterpart when she wanted to, and until war broke out, her anger was best directed at him. In some twisted way, it would probably make them both feel better. At least Sigma knew her outrage would guide her in the right direction.

Before Phi's arrival, Sigma had thought that the Capitol was finished with holding his family ransom; after all, he had fallen in line. For this assumption he does not have a pro-Capitol speech prepared, but offers as best an explanation he can manage off-the-cuff. Sigma will not look Luna in the eye as he roams about the garden, explaining himself without an ounce of passion in his voice:

"What you have seen of this country so far is not a representative sample of the state of this planet. Over 75 years ago this world was ravaged by war, and the human race barely escaped extinction. From the survivors emerged the Capitol, who keep the population alive and flourishing." He gestures out towards the horizon where human settlement extended as far as the eye could see. Even Sigma can not prevent himself from comparing this Earth to their own red planet, as though the two of them diverged from the same timeline... One where a king of infinite time succeeded and his legacy of Gamemaking was handed down, perhaps. Maybe he was being paranoid. "Of course, sustaining a threatened species is not easy. It requires a high degree of balance that must be maintained by strict government control." He changes his direction and approaches the garden's edge, keeping his distance from Luna for now. He places his hands behind his back, a king overlooking his kingdom.

"As for the Hunger Games, humans are not like gaulems. Our memory and our empathy only extends so far. If the Hunger Games did not exist, Panem would forget what it was that drove them to the brink to begin with."

Sigma turns to her suddenly, reaching out to brush a gloved hand against her wrist. Small gestures stand in for hugs and the holding of hands in Sigma's old age, but in this case, he's touched her to get her attention - to draw her eyes to his so he can communicate a hard, doubtful expression. "I was unable to protect the human race in our world, Luna. That is why I lend them my abilities, now." Luna may know him better than anyone else on the Rhizome, and he hopes she can understand how difficult this ordeal was for him. He has lost more than he can handle alone. "You are free to do as you wish," he continues intensely, "but I would ask that you trust me one more time."

Edited 2015-09-29 19:43 (UTC)

"But--"

Luna cuts herself off there, because while Sigma hasn't given her a direct answer she can make sense of the implications. The project had failed. Little wonder there, with what she remembers of her own timeline. They're in another world right now, one where humanity has been devastated in a different way - but survived enough to come back stronger than they had in their home world. Now for some reason the Capitol finds it necessary to use the Hunger Games to prevent war, and Sigma is helping them.

No. More than that. Sigma wants her trust, and that's where she can't draw a certain conclusion from his words. She's free to act, but he wants her trust? There's a war inside her, fear and confusion at what he might be asking of her together with loyalty and the knowledge that she does trust him, even if she can't condone the things he's doing. The fact that he's come close in front of Luna, looked her in the eye, touched her wrist...it's almost like her last moments with him before her death and she's finding it very difficult to think through the situation right now, let alone come up with words.

She isn't aware that her breath has quickened, but she is aware of a strange feeling in her chest. It's not the usual manifestation she's used to of a GAULEM's internal alarm signal, but she's already guessed that the body she has now is slightly different from her old one (it would have to be, with the Rhizome 9 systems absent). The feeling is distracting, to say the least, and her voice is a little breathless when she tries to answer. "Sigma, I--I trust you, but I...you know I can't..."

Can't harm people. Can't bear to let them come to harm. She does know Sigma even if she doesn't understand his intentions, and for all her doubts she does believe that he really is trying to protect humanity. But he looks at humanity in a way she can't, and she's hoping that he still knows her well enough that he knows that too.

Edited (spacing) 2015-09-30 04:25 (UTC)

Had she puzzled out his lie? If she had not, at least he has her trust. Sigma bows his head in acquiescence, unable to argue. He had believed the same thing about himself, once.

"...I know." She need not say more. Justifying her decision not to play would be lethal to them both, or, at best, force his hand against her. Making sure his players fought was a part of his job. To anyone listening, it went without saying that he would try and change her mind before the end.

For all of the youth he had held onto in a dream he feels ancient, now, carved out of a legacy of death. He’s too absorbed in his own feelings to notice that Luna’s simulated breath is quicker than he programmed, that there is a circulating pinkness to her skin. "I did not come here to lecture you." He had intended to show he cared, to assure her that she was not alone, but those plans have gone up in smoke. There is but one last thing he can offer her. "I... have something for you, Luna." He fumbles at his collar to pull a leather strap from his shirt, raises it over his neck like a man stepping out of a noose. Diana’s music box, far too feminine for a man like Sigma, still warm from the heat of his skin.

"That's..." Luna had taken the music box to be lost with her death, a detail whoever constructed her new body hadn't bothered to deal with. That Sigma has it now, and he's giving it to her again - for the second time today it mirrors the past in her memory, only this time of course it calls to mind the first time he gifted the music box to her and the happiness she felt because of it.

Luna's never told Sigma about what the gesture meant to her, but she can't help but wonder if he's sending the same message she'd felt from it the first time: Happiness is closer than you think. Even in a place like this. That together with his words gives her hope if it's true, because it means that he hasn't forgotten. For all he hasn't given her a straight answer about anything, he does remember who she is. Why she's here is still a mystery; is it because they were friends? Did he have other motives for bringing her into the Games? But if Sigma says he knows how she feels, then she trusts him. Maybe somehow, things will be okay after all.

She stretches a hand out to grip the cord, and notes the lingering warmth there. Surprisingly that makes her face and her body feel warm as well, and the strange pulsing feeling in her chest only grows stronger. Words feel thicker in her mouth. "Oh, Sigma...thank you."

Luna's cheeks turn a shade of red that Sigma swears he has never seen her wear. It's enough to send the fastidious man reeling - on the Rhizome, when a detail was incongruous with his memory, a paradox was imminent if the offending item was not restored. As his crippling headaches could attest, these blips were forces to be reckoned with and he came to fear them from the bottom of his soul.

He is taken out of the moment entirely. His answer has no heart as he stares somewhere beyond Luna. "You are welcome." Hesitating long enough to consider the consequences, Sigma reaches a tentative hand forward. Delicately he lays the back of his fingers in the space between Luna's neck and chin, an affectionate brush that could be construed by anyone else as a loving caress. Thus it was a gesture that would be, for him, unthinkable without reason.

And it is not without reason. He holds his breath as he registers the information he needs. A... pulse... Specifically the firm beat of a carotid artery...

Sigma's mouth goes dry and he finds he cannot swallow. He withdraws his hand from her as though he had been shocked, gaze drawing down and inward. The idea is impossible, but he cannot prevent himself from thinking she may be occupying Diana's body...

He turns away from her, lips set hard into the wrinkles of his face, repulsed - not by Luna, but by the Capitol's machinations. He has no desire to die, but at that moment he wishes he could simply cease to exist, slip quietly into another universe where there were no Games. But he cannot, because Luna deserves at least a part of the truth. He hopes to tell her it in its entirety before he dies. "Luna. Your body..." He wonders if she will be as disturbed by such a violation. Perhaps she would be content until her inevitably messy death from which a robot would have, likely, easily recovered. "...It is not the one I designed."

The gift of the music box has given Luna a surge of hope, but that promptly drains away when the kindness disappears out of Sigma's voice and Luna feels him looking past her. Has she said something wrong? Should she not have taken the necklace? She lowers her hand nervously and the hope fades to confusion and a hint of fear as Sigma stares at her, with a spike of something when he brushes his fingers near her throat. It's an intimate gesture, but Luna recognizes almost immediately that it isn't intended as such. It jolts her nerves all the same, especially with how she still feels about him, but they don't have that sort of relationship and she doesn't expect one (aside from a tiny, traitorous part of her mind - but never mind that).

She's jolted again when Sigma recoils, because while she doesn't know what he was intending that certainly isn't the reaction she expected out of it. It's evident from that and his abrupt change in behavior that something is wrong, but she can't imagine what it is until he speaks. Until now Luna has been going forward with a few main assumptions, all boiling down to that Sigma has singlehandedly rebuilt her for some purpose. If Sigma didn't build her current body, and in fact seems shocked to discover that fact...well, that knocks away those assumptions and it leaves her grasping at empty air.

"How is that...?" Luna looks down at her body and lifts the hand with the music box's cord. She uses her other hand to feel her arm, and a few things start to fit together in her mind. She'd noticed a slightly alien feel to her body, and attributed it to the realization that she was on Earth with its higher gravity. She'd realized early on that to be here outside the Rhizome required a different body, and so written off her inability to access anything but her own thought processes as a form of severe restriction: being locked into her body for this new life, rather than locked out for her death. It's possible that this is still the case, at least, but if so it doesn't seem to be by Sigma's hands.

She looks up at Sigma with confusion clear in her eyes, even though she knows he may not understand what's happened any better than she has. The idea that Luna's body isn't mechanical hasn't yet occurred to her simply because it's so impossible, but then again she hasn't yet come up with any explanation as to how this is possible.

What could he possibly say to a face like that? His soul writhes within him and he can feel every terrible thing he's ever done to her crawling on his back. If it was their goal to break him, then the Capitol was right to bring Luna to Panem. With that look in her eyes- unmistakably sentient and lost- he thought he might do anything to prevent her from ending up with a blindfold on and a bullet in her head, too.

It takes the whole of his will to maintain eye contact. His voice is low and thick with a concern he can no longer conceal. "I believe they have given you a human body. Their technology is certainly capable." It is agonizing to say so and not unlike delivering a death sentence, but she deserved to hear it from him before she went into the Games. It does not occur to him that she may yet be a 'robot' composed of organic processes instead of electronic ones; later he may realize that this was the Capitol's intention. He pretends to be the stronger of the two as he continues, hastily relaying the foundation beneath her feet. "It will not be an easy transition, I am sure. I will be busy in the days to come, but as your programmer, if there is anything you need of me..."

His support may be a token effort. He doesn't actually know what he would do if Luna tried to reach him during work, for contact with her from hereon in would be heavily discouraged. But she had once said that she would appreciate a lie... and it makes him feel better with himself to know that he has passed on his concern, in some way. He had wasted too many years withholding affection.

A human body. That was--shouldn't it be impossible? Luna's hardly blind to the fact that she works for someone who can jump through time, but all the same the idea of taking a GAULEM like her and turning her human doesn't seem to work at all. They're just not the same thing, even if they look and act similarly. Technology should only go so far...but she believes Sigma, and when she looks down at her body and moves her hand to her chest she realizes that the strange feeling there must be a heartbeat. That's only what makes sense, isn't it? Even if it doesn't really make sense.

The whole thing is disorienting, because while Luna's had fantasies of having the life humans do she's never expected to be a human and as much as she feels the gap between herself and humanity heavily, her nature as a GAULEM is still part of who she is. From his tone she can tell Sigma knows that, and the fact that he's offered to help is in fact a comfort to her even if she doesn't even know what help there is to give. That doesn't completely steady her voice when she tries to smile and reassure him, but she hopes the gratitude still comes across. "Of course. Thank you, Sigma. I'll..." She doesn't know what she's going to do, actually, but she is going to have to figure it out now. "I'll let you know if I need anything, but right now I want to think."

And it's strange, Sigma asking her if she needs anything from him and her acknowledging the same. So often it's the other way around. But in this, maybe, they're closer to equals than circumstances would be otherwise. Luna moves to place the music box around her neck, and the familiar weight settling there gives her a little comfort.

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What pretty cheeks they have, what pretty frocks they have!

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