That was at least slightly reassuring. Guy took in a deep breath and sat up. His cheeks were still flushed from embarrassment.
"It's just, when I was kid, I..."
It was a sensitive subject but it was also part of his reality so he carried on. It certainly wasn't the first time he'd talked to strangers about it, after all. During those years when it was just him and his pet sloth, Belt, the families and tribes he'd occasionally run into wondered what a lone teenage boy was doing wandering around on his own. They'd asked questions and he'd gotten used to answering them.
"I, uh, lost my family. I was about seven." He added by way of brief explanation, "Tar pit. It's - just don't say anything about it, people always say they're sorry and - it's okay. I found peace with it a long time ago. But the last thing my mom and dad told me was - they told me not to hide. To live a good life. They told me to follow the sun and that if I did, I'd make it to Tomorrow."
Somehow the capital "T" is there even in how he says the words.
"I think they just meant I'd make it to the next day but but I thought Tomorrow was a place, some special place I could get to if I traveled far enough. I came up with this whole crazy theory that it had to be in the days after today, very far away. I figured if each sun went across the sky and got stuck up with the other stars, if I could ride on it'd let me jump to it, a place where - where things were better."
His nodded slowly his gaze distant, and then he turned to Julian.
"I needed it. I was a little kid all alone in the wilderness. I needed to think that -" He cut himself off and looked at the floor.
"Anyway, about two years ago, when I was traveling, the ground started to break up and there was lava - and I thought that was the end of the world. Whole bits of the land were cracking up and sliding into nothing! I met my new family during all that and we made it up to a mountain where the sun set and we almost didn't make it. The ground broke up in front of us and blocked the way but then Grug, my dad - well, my mate's dad but now he's my dad - he threw us across the divide. Everything collapsed and we thought we'd lost him but then he found a way over himself."
He shook his head.
"The place where we all crossed over - the dust covered the sun and it was filled with bright light behind the clouds so all this time, I thought we'd ridden the sun. To Tomorrow, to the world of a new day. And when I was little, I thought I was following a different sun each day and it was the same one the entire time. Just...going around the world in a circle."
He twirled his finger vaguely.
"Tomorrow wasn't a place, it was just..." He trailed off. "I feel like an idiot."
no subject
"It's just, when I was kid, I..."
It was a sensitive subject but it was also part of his reality so he carried on. It certainly wasn't the first time he'd talked to strangers about it, after all. During those years when it was just him and his pet sloth, Belt, the families and tribes he'd occasionally run into wondered what a lone teenage boy was doing wandering around on his own. They'd asked questions and he'd gotten used to answering them.
"I, uh, lost my family. I was about seven." He added by way of brief explanation, "Tar pit. It's - just don't say anything about it, people always say they're sorry and - it's okay. I found peace with it a long time ago. But the last thing my mom and dad told me was - they told me not to hide. To live a good life. They told me to follow the sun and that if I did, I'd make it to Tomorrow."
Somehow the capital "T" is there even in how he says the words.
"I think they just meant I'd make it to the next day but but I thought Tomorrow was a place, some special place I could get to if I traveled far enough. I came up with this whole crazy theory that it had to be in the days after today, very far away. I figured if each sun went across the sky and got stuck up with the other stars, if I could ride on it'd let me jump to it, a place where - where things were better."
His nodded slowly his gaze distant, and then he turned to Julian.
"I needed it. I was a little kid all alone in the wilderness. I needed to think that -" He cut himself off and looked at the floor.
"Anyway, about two years ago, when I was traveling, the ground started to break up and there was lava - and I thought that was the end of the world. Whole bits of the land were cracking up and sliding into nothing! I met my new family during all that and we made it up to a mountain where the sun set and we almost didn't make it. The ground broke up in front of us and blocked the way but then Grug, my dad - well, my mate's dad but now he's my dad - he threw us across the divide. Everything collapsed and we thought we'd lost him but then he found a way over himself."
He shook his head.
"The place where we all crossed over - the dust covered the sun and it was filled with bright light behind the clouds so all this time, I thought we'd ridden the sun. To Tomorrow, to the world of a new day. And when I was little, I thought I was following a different sun each day and it was the same one the entire time. Just...going around the world in a circle."
He twirled his finger vaguely.
"Tomorrow wasn't a place, it was just..." He trailed off. "I feel like an idiot."